...i remember last valentines day...exactly a week after Aimee and Dana were born and taken to Heaven...how i thought i'd never make it through another day. I cant believe they would be a year old already.
I had all these plans...how i'd commemorate them...and i didnt...couldnt...do anything. All i did was have day dreams of them with pig tails and crawling around my living room floor...giggling while i chased them into the kitchen...the dreams were so vivid it was like i had true memories of them...
my husband brought me home two baby pink long stemmed roses...and i just cried...but then i was okay til my sister sent me a bouquet that said 'remembering with you'...and that was it...i just shut down. I couldnt think about them...i tried to remember the horror of that day and found i couldnt...its like my brain shut it out. Sighhhhhhh...
I heard a song on the cmt station...it was called 'didnt know my name'...he wrote a song from the point of view of a baby who was miscarried...how it was taken by the hand and walked to Heaven...and there at the end of the video you see two little girls...side by side...walking into the light with this cowboy (the singer). I really think that my girls send me signs...that might sound weird...but i think they find ways to let me know they're okay. Sounds dumb but it makes me feel better.
Anyway sorry for my rambling...i just wanted to say
happy birthday to my angel babies...hoping the angels make you pigtails...like i would...
love mommie






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