Dawn in KS

Hi ladies!!

This is sort of a rant, but more of a "What do you do when this happens?" kind of post. . . .

Since adopting our son last February, I've had several people-- from relatives to people I barely know--- continuing to ask about my childbearing status.

We are keeping a friend's teenage foster daughter for the week while they are on vacation. Last night, we were talking about Isaiah's adoption. Right in front of him, she asked me, "When are you going to have one of your own?" I told her that I already had one of my own, and that he was standing right in front of her. She pressed me a little further but quickly gave up the fight when she figured out that I wasn't going to give her an answer in the way that she was looking for one.

I know that people are generally well-meaning, but this really gets on my nerves. Does this ever happen to anyone else? What do you do?

__________________
DH (32)
Me (29)
Son (7)- Adopted on 02/05/03!
"Part-time" Foster Parent
Would love to talk with other transracial families!

Tbrown

I may be a little more in your face than you want to be but I have told people "Well, I would be thrilled if God blesses us with a BIOLOGICAL (Stress this word) CHILD but he/or she would be no more mine to "OWN" than if I adopted ten
more." And then I laugh and give my daughter a big kiss and say "Isn't that right Kaitlyn?" LOL

skiboo

DH and I have just started the adoption process and people keep asking us if we are going to continue to try to have a baby of our own... I tell them that this baby will be ours and that we consider any child to be a blessing, whether they are biological or adopted.... and I refuse to say anything more beyond that.

Janie

__________________
Me: 40 DH: 40 Married 04/21/01
dx pcos 1998; have been on Metformin for 6 yrs (2000 mg/day)
Ectopic pg 08/02 ... HSG 09/02 -- all clear
Five failed clomid rounds as of 2/27/03
Laparoscopy 03/11/03; found multiple fibroids and endometriosis
3 rounds of Gonal-F injections with IUI's -- all a BUST!!
Myomectomy on July 8, 2003 to remove fibroids.
Adopted the Light of My Life on July 14th, 2004 from St. Petersburg, Russia

rachelmichellek

"Do you mean if I eventually give birth to a child? Well, then Isaiah will have a little brother or sister!!!"

HTW

I had a situation that was simular, my best friend (whom I believe to be PCOS too) lost a baby last Fall. We where talking about how much she wants another child. She has two birth children. I mentioned to her that adoption was allways an option (I have two biological children and a third adopted one). She said that she had mentioned it to her DH but he just did not want one that was not "his". I was so mad!!!!! NOT HIS????? He did not think he could treat an adopted child like his own two biological children.
Bailey (my adopted dd) is so much my daughter as the one I gave birth to. The night I sat up all night holding a croupy Bailey and praying for her health was the night I realized that I had stopped thinking of her as my adopted dd. She was my DAUGHTER. I have to remind myself that she is adopted. In fact, she looks more like me than my biological daughter does. I think we need to have compassion on those that have never felt the joy of adoption. The just do not konw what they are missing.
You are doing the right thing. You keep answering honestly and openly. Eventually you will educate everyone around you!!!
God bless you and yours
Hears The Water