Well this time last year i started to feel like something wasn't right....and five days later my baby was gone......i hate this....i really do....i hate how i feel and how i feel robbed....by baby would be here and i wouldnt be in such pain...i feel like no one remembers him or the pain i am feeling. I am now pregnant again and have such a hard time with this pregnancy i almost feel like I am never going to bring a baby home~
I miss my son.....so much my hurt just absolutly hurts.....it physically hurts....
It took almost a year to get pregnant again and i am grateful and understand that it will take time to allow myself to enjoy this pregnancy....
But for now i miss my son.......i truly do....
__________________ 5 IVF Cycles...
1 Beautiful baby boy in heaven.......Emmanuel (GOD is with US)
1 Beautiful baby girl LuV To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. BuG....born 1/20/08 33 weeks 1 day...... To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
27 Days in the NICU....before Nichole Victoria came home to her parents!
"Having done all that you can.........just STAND"
I am eternally grateful for all that I have, all that i have been through and all that GOD has in store for me and my family.....
I'm sorry this is a really rough time! A mother's grief is excruciating, but you will survive. These anniversaries keep coming, and they aren't easy no matter how busy you are with the next one(s). Many hugs coming your way!!
__________________ Metformin 1500mg, Yasmin, managing IR/pcos with lower carbs
First pregnancy ended at 23 weeks due to incompetent cervix.
To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. Mary Catherine will be in our hearts forever, November 28, 2003.
Second loss March 9, 2004 at five weeks
Third pregnancy, Cerclage at 13w
To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. Duncan 2/11/05, 9lb 3oz
Fourth pregnancy, Cerclage at 13w
To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. Ruby 2/27/06, 9lbs
Im sorry. I understan what you mean about physically hurting. I also understand what you mean about being the only one to remember and grieve. Please enjoy your current pregnancy, its such a great time in your life (well, for most people)
__________________
Sarah 30, DH Matt 31, Foster Son 17
IVF #1 Quinten Patrick born 3/17/06 To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
IVF #2 "Lilly" ended in mc 7/21/2007 at 5.5 wks, IVF#3 11/2007: BFN, IVF #4 4/2008: BFN To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
IVF #5 8/2009: BFN To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
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I am so sorry Storms, losing a baby does take away the innocence and romanticism of being pregnant. August 05 we lost our first (an early mc) and August 06 I gave birth to DD. It was hard because I felt like I was the only one who remembered. Even though I had a new baby, I still felt grief and loss for my first baby. You can always come here for support and work through some of these feelings. I do hope you can come to enjoy and embrace this pregnancy, but I know how fear and worry can hinder that. You are in my prayers, fellow March mommy.
__________________ Nicole (32)+ DH (33) Married June 4, 2000 my blog! To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
dx PCOS Fall 2000 TTC since Sept 2006 1st BFP Dec 2006 lost @8 weeks To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
My God Daughter was born two days before my son....and i just dont know how to approach this....i want to just mail a card and send a gift but it just reminds me of what i loss.....
I want to bake a cake on Friday and just be by myself....as much as i want to honor him....i feel like nothing is good enough or can help. I was doing so well....i actually felt like i could mourn and not feel such dispair...i still havent put his clothes and things away.....they are just sitting in the room the same way i left them....a year ago....
I know this is hard for some ladies to read knowing that i am currently pregnant....but in hind sight i just didnt expect these feelings to flood me so bad.....and i now also feel terrible for appearing to be ungrateful....all i wanted to feel when i lost my son was pregnant again....and after 3 more IVF's this pregnancy feels unreal to me....
The emotions can come on you like a giant wave out of nowhere, you are okay one day, then the tide rolls in and all the emotion comes flooding back. It is okay to mourn again and grieve again, anniversaries definitely make you do this. Do whatever you want on Friday. If making a cake and eating the whole thing is what you want then do it. I just take anniversary times to reflect, go through some keepsakes I have and just sob. Some people release balloons, which is something I have thought about. Others give gifts to charity that is age appropriate for their lost child. Like you said, nothing feels like it is enough, but just do whatever you need to do right now. I am sure this pregnancy does feel unreal right now, but give it some time. Let yourself grieve during the sad times and embrace those happy times that are coming.
Labor Day (PG and Loss Mentioned) 
