Libido increase in third trimester ?

Monita · 08-25-2009, 11:18 PM

Hi Ladies

This is kinda personal but I have been meaning to ask in order to know if it is not only me !!

Due to the fact that we struggled so much to finally get our BFP, DH made the decision not to have sex for the entire pregnancy. Even if thank God we have had a healthy pregnancy and our doctor gave his blessing, he still wants to wait because he said he would never forgive himself if for a moment of pleasure he would endanger this pregnancy. So, we have not had sex for some months.

Lately I have felt an increase in my libido, matching an increase I also had of it early in pregnancy ( probably due to all the hormones I was on for the first trimester ). Spontaneous orgasms are happening more often, as well as in general an increase of libido.

I have noted as well that thinking about sex helps me relax and forget about the concerns of the upcoming delivery, as well as the pains or discomforts of being PG. It has like a relaxing effect that works better than any remedies for anxiety !! Maybe it is the release of the endorfines related to sex that works... Even if I do not get "action" with DH, thinking about sex does the trick and relaxes me a lot.

But I am not sure if this is only because of the abstinence months, or if it is normal and natural. I have no idea if it is healthy to allow me to think about sex everyday for a while, since now I know it works in relaxing me...so I use it a lot. I don´t want to become an addict later on !! I used to be more on the lowish side of sex drive until I got PG !! LOL

Any comments / experiences ?
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goodbyeluv4ever · 08-25-2009, 11:45 PM

I've had no sex drive and have not had sex in months! So none of that happening to me. How far along are you?

AMYvsPCOS · 08-26-2009, 03:15 AM

NO sex?! For the whole 9 months? Man, pregnancy is the only time that I want sex more than my dh. That's really sweet of your dh but does he know there is no medical basis for it? Especially now that you are further along?

ALC · 08-26-2009, 03:18 AM

I'll keep an eye on this thread because I'm curious to hear about other people's sex drives. We haven't had sex since we conceived in April, and I totally don't miss it. I HATE that. I've always had a pretty low sex drive due to PCOS, but now with pregnancy, it's completely wiped out. I hope to experience a rise in drive, but so far, sex is the last thing on my mind. Gah.

Daisychain · 08-26-2009, 11:12 AM

That is unfortunate for you that your DH has decided no sex until the baby comes
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My DH LOVED it when I told him I was preggo the second time, he knew he'd be getting it ALOT...during pregnancy, I was tmi, at my horniest...and the orgasms were the most intense (hence me wanting to jump him all.the.time)

After birth, both times, my sex drive bombed...I didn't want sex...well, let's just say, DD#2 is almost 3 and I still don't really want to do it...although I put on a happy face and get on with it, usually once we get started I do get into the spirit of it...

As long as there are no complications in your pregnancy and you are not feeling too uncomfortable in your stage of pregnancy, then sex is fine...and encouraged. Sex is the glue that keeps a couple in sync..and it's a great stress reliever....you might want to remind him that AFTER the baby is born, there will be about 6 weeks when there will be a ban on sex as you recover...and then who knows what your sex drive will be like...

Sherrylen9 · 08-26-2009, 12:46 PM

I understand your fears I had those too, but we didn't even make it out of the first trimester with out *dtd*. It brings us together and has so much to offer. I have heard that your sex life goes through a transformation after birth of your child, so I would enjoy the closest now. I too have been more aroused at times, (last-night intense!) So get with it girl and get your freak on!! LOL

jessietex · 08-26-2009, 06:07 PM

I lvoe this thread! We haven't had sex since we found out in June because a) dh was a little freaked out & b) I didn't want him near me! Now he's not freaked anymore & I'm ready for some action!!!

Asherlexie · 08-26-2009, 07:00 PM

Lol you girls are so funny :p We waited til after 12 weeks to have sex and I barely would let him go in. Now I do as long as he doesn't touch anything with his disco stick lol. But, now OMG past week I have been so... turned on by the easiet things! Sadly, hubs isn't a sexual person so I'm back to begging again
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Monita · 08-27-2009, 03:08 PM

Hey ladies !!

Thanks for your comments and advice !! I think it is going to be hard to convince DH to give it a try... I mean, because we struggled for years and years to have this baby, I guess he is really freaked out about any complication caused by him... poor thing. I know he wants to, but so far he is settling with "self satisfaction" to cope with the dry sex spell.... I understand him, maybe I would be in the same position.

My little girl does not seem to mind... I think she even loves it when I am more relaxed... she just wants to hear our voices all day long, but I am sure she would not understand at all what is going on if we had sex. Anyhow, I found that nature is really wise and the hormones in sex are really meant to help and relax our troubled and worried bodies and minds. So, even if I do not get action, I will continue enjoying it when it happens spontaneously or in my mind LOL !!

Sherrylen9 · 08-27-2009, 03:23 PM

I will tell you what I've done to my dh before.... In the morning I've woke him up riding him
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You just got to be really sneaky and don't wake him until you're "engaged" My hubbys a hard sleeper by the way! LOL It was the best "Good Morning!" he's ever had!!!!
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Maloney25 · 08-30-2009, 01:36 AM

Well my sex drive is definatly in full swing, but now that I am 7 mos preggo and hubby has felt the baby moving he is so weirded out by it that he doesnt want to have sex at all. This is our first and he has been a little hesitant from the beginning just because of the thought of the baby. He is such a dork, I think he believes the baby might know what we are doing.

Acajou73 · 08-30-2009, 09:10 AM

I'm not in the 3rd trimester yet (close though), but have very little interest in sex now. In the first trimester, I was "in the mood" all of the time. Now, if I never had sex again, it wouldn't bother me...well I want more kids so I guess that part would, but as for having sex just for sex. I can do without it.

CysterLocs · 08-31-2009, 02:29 PM

Monita, my DH is the exact same way. he's been freaked out since we finally conceived. no matter how many times i tell him there's nothing he could do to hurt the baby, he says he would never forgive himself. he was better last week, but it's not like it was before. he's very gentle and 'to the point now', but i'll take what i can get!