| Christian Mommy
Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: home
Posts: 2,312
My Mood:  Points: 9,580.66 Bank: 484,851.32 Total Points: 494,431.98 |  Light hearted funnies
> KIDS IN CHURCH
>
>
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
>
>
>
> 3-year-old, Reese:
>
> "Our Father, Who does art in
> heaven, Harold is His name.
> Amen."
>
>
>
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
>
>
>
> A little boy was overheard praying:
>
> "Lord, if you
> can't make me a better
> boy, don't worry about it.
> I'm having a real good
> time like I am."
>
>
>
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
>
>
>
> A. Sunday school class was studying the Ten
> Commandments. They were ready to
> discuss the last one. The teacher asked if anyone
> could tell her what it
> was. Susie raised her hand, stood tall, and quoted,
>
> "Thou shall not take
> the covers off the neighbor's wife."
>
>
>
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
>
>
>
> After the christening of his baby brother in church,
> Jason sobbed all the
> way home in the back seat of the car. His father
> asked him three times what
> was wrong. Finally, the boy replied,
>
> "That preacher
> said he wanted us
> brought up in a
> Christian home, and
> I wanted to stay
> with you guys."
>
>
>
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~
>
>
>
> I had been teaching my three-year old daughter,
> Caitlin, the Lord's Prayer
> for several evenings at bedtime, she would repeat
> after me the lines from
> the prayer. Finally, she decided to go solo.
> I listened with pride as she carefully enunciated
> each word right up to the
> end of the prayer:
> "Lead us not into temptation,"
> she prayed,
> "but deliver
> us some E-mail.
> Amen."
>
>
>
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
>
>
>
> and one particular four-year-old prayed,
> "And
> forgive us our trash baskets
> as we forgive those who put trash in our baskets."
>
>
>
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
>
>
>
> A Sunday school teacher asked her children, as they
> were on the way to
> church service, "And why is it necessary to be
> quiet in church?"
> One bright little girl replied,
> "Because people are
> sleeping."
>
>
>
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
>
>
>
> Six-year-old Angie and her four-year-old brother Joel
> were sitting together
> in church. Joel giggled, sang, and talked out loud.
> Finally, his big sister had had enough. You're not supposed to talk out
> loud in church." "Why? Who's going to stop me?" Joel
> asked.
> Angie pointed to the back of the church and said,
> "See those two men
> standing by the door?
> They're hushers."
>
>
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
>
>
>
> A mother was preparing pancakes for her sons, Kevin,
> 5, Ryan 3. The boys
> began to argue over who would get the first pancake.
> Their mother saw the
> opportunity for a moral lesson. "If Jesus were
> sitting here, He would say,
> 'Let my brother have the first pancake, I can wait.'"
> Kevin turned to his
> younger brother and said,
> "Ryan, you be Jesus!"
>
>
>
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
>
>
>
> A father was at the beach with his children when the
> four- year-old son ran
> up to him, grabbed his hand, and led him to the shore
> where a seagull lay
> dead in the sand. "Daddy, what happened to him?" the
> son asked.
> "He died and went to Heaven," the Dad replied.
> The boy thought a moment and then said,
> "Did God
> throw him back down?"
>
>
>
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
>
>
>
> A wife invited some people to dinner. At the table,
> she turned to their
> six-year-old daughter and said, "Would you like to
> say the blessing?"
> "I wouldn't know what to say," the girl replied.
> "Just say what you hear Mommy say," the wife
> answered.
> The daughter bowed her head and said,
> "Lord, why on
> earth did I invite all
> these people to dinner?"
> |
