Hi ladies, I usually lurk here and do not post much. I was devestated this week to learn that my baby passed. We went in for a scan at 9w2d and there was no HB. I had a D&C yesterday. Today I would have been 10weeks. I am so sad and feel wracked with guilt. Guilt because I was not on metformin or anything. I just read last night that 60% of women with PCOS miscarry in the first trimester. I new there was a chance - not that the odds were so high!! I have a 3 year old and he is my life - I conceived him after 5 years of TTC without any drugs or metformin. This after 4 IUI's - we were getting ready to start IVF and we got a big surprise. I feel like I was naive. My RE says these things happen but I feel so bad that maybe I could have done something.
I am terrified to try again. I guess I just wanted to share my story.
Please tell me when this pain goes away. What is awful is I still have awful pregnancy symptoms from nausea to sore breasts and the blue veins all over them. It's a cruel joke.
Mara - I'm so sorry to hear of your great loss. I suffered a miscarriage that was determined on 3/23/09 and a D&C on 3/26/09. I don't know when the pain goes away, because my pain is still present. I broke down again today during church service, which I argued with myself before going this morning. I am glad that I went, but the pastor's message seemed to be right for me and my mourning right now.
I'll be praying for you and I hope that you have some support to help you through this difficult time.
__________________ "Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God..." Philippians 4:6
Jenn, DH, & DD 5
Baby #2 ANGEL Baby/D&C 3/26/09 To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
TTC #3 - Cycle 1 - 5/23/09 - Menopur (busted on 6/5/09)
Cycle 2 - RE consult on 11/24/09! Praying to make our family grow to 4! To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
GOD ALWAYS ANSWERS PRAYERS!!!
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Time can not heal the wounds of losing your baby, but it will become more bearable.
Take your time, be gentle with yourself. It will get easier with time, the pain will become more bearable. You will always miss that baby, but one it won't hurt as much. Right now, it's overwhelming. But eventually, it will become easier to breath.
Don't feel guilty, you did nothing wrong.
My first m/c I was not on Metformin. This m/c, I was. While Metformin can reduce the risk of m/c, it does not prevent m/c from happening if it's going to happen. Don't blame yourself.
Take care hun.
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Stephanie 24 & DH 24
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three inject cycles 7 clomid
TTC +2 years
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"If you're going through hell, keep going." Winston Churchill
Mara~I was due in November too and lost my baby at 7 weeks 2 days. It is unbearable and I am so sorry for your loss. There are so many questions that are left unanswered and I don't know how to move on right now either.
But I think we need this time to grieve for our losses and it is ok. I know the shock and disbelief too.
I can't look at my u/s pics or even my date book since I marked up until may each day and how far along I would be.
It is so sad that this happens. I pray for you to get your miracle soon.
I wasn't on Met either and I get nervous thinking what if...but like PP said...if it is going to happen it will happen no matter what.
Mara ~ I am so sorry for your loss. Unfortunately, I don't know honestly if the pain ever goes away. You always wonder what if? You'll remember your EDD thinking what should be. But as time goes on it DOES get easier to deal with. Your a mother who lost her baby, that never leaves you. But it will get easier, just keep taking it a day at a time. The future is too far off and right now is all you have. Best of luck and please feel free to post if you need any comfort. We definetly know what it's like to have a loss and the millions of emotions that come with it.
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Kristina (27), Dustin (28)
& Ani Rose (6)
The Johnson Fam est 10/26/02
Two angel babies:
16wks 10/08 & 9wks 03/09
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Mara, Im so sorry hun. I too had a mc in 2004 at 9 weeks 3 days. I went to the emergency room because i had been spotting dark color and they found no heart beat. The nurse did turn the screen around to show me the baby though. I wanted to see atleast the one time. I do have the ultra sound pic to keep forever though. The pain doesnt ever really go away but u get stronger. It at times helps me when I go outside and look up and talk to my baby angel. My sister at one time told me that God is cradeling my baby in his arms until I get there. It helped me soo soo much. It was the best thing I could hear at that time and I hold on to it. I know it's the truth so it helps. Hope to help some and good luck to you hun! Take care <3
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BF 2004 nomeds
just lost 17lbsMC
TTC#1
MetforminER1500mg
Soy120mg3-7
Provera
pre.vites
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Mara I am so sorry for your loss.I too had a miscarriage at 9 weeks 3 days and D&C about 10 weeks and it was devestating as it was my husbands first biological child, I blamed myself for not being on metformin but my doctor told me that I needed to stop blaming myself and that it just happens,I did struggle with myself though.
Give yourself time to greive, I think the pain over time lessons but will always be in your heart. thinking of you (((HUGS)))
Im so sorry for your loss, I lost my baby @ 10wks on april 21st due 13th nov so I know how your feeling, and it has just started to get a bit better, when u finally can start trying again it helps lift your spirits and u feel more hopeful, I always think about my baby, and when everyone else around u is preg it is a sad reminder but all you can do is keep on being strong and know your baby will come back to you soon
:-)
sorry to hear about your loss don't blame youself, this could have happened under different circumstances as well. remember-God only puts us through tough times when he knows we can make it thru them
I'm so sorry for your loss and how let down and devastated you must feel. It is such an awful process on so many levels and you are right about how it feels cruel to still show signs of pregnancy when you know it isn't there. I have had 4 losses (I have 2 boys though) and one loss happened in my 13th week - right before a wedding I was to be in as a bridesmaid. i remember looking in the mirror at a slight bulge and being frustrated that it was there, when the baby wasn't!
Again, I'm so sorry. The pain will lessen, and time really does help, but for now as the emotions are raw, my best advice is to give yoursel permission to feel however you feel from one day to the next. The best friends I had were ones that said - you know what, this does suck! I didn't want any cherry coated pep talks in the beginning.
I wish you all the best and lots of comfort - big hug!
Loss at 9w2d, D&C yesterday - I am so sad :( 
I guess I just wanted to share my story.
