SweetMe

I sit with blades of steel,
Sit and rock,
Til I cannot feel,
Til I create a block.

I sit and look,
See them there,
They're like a hook,
Without a care.

A hook that pulls into a world,
A world of despair,
Into that place I am hurled,
But I did not want to go there.

This place is full of hurt,
Of anger and of pain,
Round the edges i'll skirt,
But find me now, bound with a chain.

The chain gets tight,
Pulls me in,
I cannot fight,
It pulls me into sin.

A world of self harm,
People alive, but inside ,
This world has no charm,
A river of has bled.

I am so scared,
I try to get away,
This place has me snared,
And I will pay.

As I cut into my flesh,
Blood flows so red,
Bright red, so fresh,
I too inside am .

Lured into this hell,
Pulled and forced to cut,a
Now I am just a shell,
And the door back is firmly shut.

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Kwriter

Great poem. I know how you feel. I'm a cutter, too. I have a lot of scars to prove it. Sometimes that's the only thing that makes you feel better. It's a constant struggle for me to accept that I'm a special person and that I deserve happiness. Being depressed is what's comfortable to me. I've been like this my whole life. But we gotta be able to step out of that comfort zone if we're going to make it. Do you know what I mean? It is my experience that depression is a degenerative disease that only gets worse. If you don't something to change it, you're going to end up six feet under. I am too. And nobody really wants to die; they just want to escape the pain.

K_c_S

i get what ur expressing chic...good work

isenephthys

that was very expressive. i have been cutting since i was 16. (i'm 27 now.) i totally empathize with your emotions... once you go there, you never truly go back, even though you desperately want to.

thank you for sharing that with us.

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"live. love. be. believe." -the Cruxshadows