Miscarriage

foreverd · 01-11-2008, 01:07 PM

I had a d&c yesterday.......this was my first miscarriage.....and I feel soo empty......my mind is a blank and just don't want to do anything......
how do I go on.....doing daily things when it's the last thing I want to do.....

maddieb · 01-11-2008, 01:19 PM

Foreverd --

I am so sorry for your loss. Big hugs to you. We are all here for you.

NerdyGirl · 01-11-2008, 01:32 PM

foreverd~ I am so sorry for your loss ((HUGS)). Just take it minute by minute. If you can't concentrate on something, don't worry about it. Work, relationships, whatever. It'll all be there tomorrow and you need to take care of yourself right now.

nasheajones · 01-11-2008, 01:45 PM

I am so sorry

Time helps a little..a good cry helps more..

wahoo96 · 01-11-2008, 08:43 PM

Foreverd,

2 weeks ago today, I had my D&C. I can honestly say, this m/c has had me at my lowest emotional state. Today, I can say I feel better. It takes time. Right now, just focus on you and dealing with your grief. Cry it out, yell, scream, journal, whatever way you can express yourself. It doesn't happen overnight. I still have really sad spells and I cry and just get depressed. But for me, I can only deal one minute, one day at a time. Some books have really helped me. Of course, I cry when I try to read them, but the testimonies of others do help, although, your pain is truly just yours. We're here to listen.....

danibell · 01-12-2008, 12:07 AM

Honey I ditto wahoo, right now you take literally one minute at a time. I just had my d&c on tuesday and I'm an emotional hormonal mess still. First your life has just been drastically altered in the space of a minute of time. You can physcially feel the changes from one day of pregnancy to after the d&c the next, and it throws your mind completely out of whack. Mentally you have to reorder the next 9 months of your life, and beyond, because you don't know what to expect. And emotionally you are dealing with huge hormonal swings on top of the grief of losing a baby.

One minute, one hour, one day at a time sweetie. This is my second m/c, and I'm here to tell you it WILL get better. You'll never be "over" it. There will be times in your life where you will think of the "what could have been's" and "what should have been's". But you will find ways to move on, to get over the humps, and eventually the sad days will get further and further apart, until your happy days start to outnumber the sad ones again.

Don't expect too much of yourself, leave the housework, leave the cooking, take time off work if you can, and focus on YOU right now. Today was the first meal I've cooked since my d&c. Today I did dishes for the first time. And washed a load of clothes. It takes time, and you have to let yourself take that time, otherwise you'll bottle it up inside and you won't have a chance to let go and move on!!

foreverd · 01-12-2008, 02:44 PM

Thank you Ladies...

you are right ...one minute at a time is all I can think about right now......

toshia · 01-12-2008, 04:36 PM

I am so sorry for your loss. The best thing you can do is take it minute by minute. I will tell you though that it is best to let your emotions out. If you need to scream then scream, cry then cry, whatever you need to let out do it. I had a m/c in June of 2006 and it does still hurt but not as bad as it did then. You will be a different person. You will never be the same. Don't try to make yourself get over it because that will make it worse. Let your body tell you when you are doing better. *hugs* You can pm me anytime if you need to.