 Ms. Cellophane
This weekend I saw a production of Chicago, and there is a song in the show called "Mr. Cellophane". Some of the lyrics:
Mr. Cellophane, Mr. Cellophane, should have been my name, Mr. Cellophane, 'cause you can see right through me, walk right by me, and never know I'm there...
I nearly cried in the theater, and it has been in my head ever since -- that is such a good description of how I feel. Why am I invisible? I think I am a nice person, I am always the one who is there to help move, or paint, or bring magazines and soup to a sick friend -- and everyone is happy to take my help -- but I don't get invited to do fun stuff -- there have even been times when I have been with my so-called friends and they have been talking about other stuff they are doing together that I am not invited to.
I was brought up to believe that it is rude to invite yourself places, or just show up unasked. I'm not saying I want an engraved invitation to go bowling, but a "hey, you wanna come bowling" doesn't seem like it would be that much effort. There have actually been occasions where there has been a party, etc, and someone after the fact has asked me why I wasn't there, when I wasn't invited -- how can I go if no one bothers to tell me.
I used to think people didn't like me, but I don't think that is the case -- I think I just don't matter to anyone. I think I would rather they hate me -- at least then they would know I exist.
if you have gotten this far, thanks for reading...I just wanted to get that off my chest...
__________________
To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
| 
