Need help! Where to start?!?

alisonj · 08-03-2004, 09:07 AM

I am frustrated with no luck in the TTC area. My husband and I agreed when this happened we would pursue other alternatives of having a baby.

We both have been interested in adoption even before the TTC problems came about. Can anyone give me any insight on where to start? I've been looking at a lot of the websites listed on the sticky, but I don't know if that helps me too much. I am looking into purchasing a book I found - Adoption for Dummies (you all know the popular series) to get some help. Any suggestions, words of wisdom or advice would be much appreciated. We really don't know where to start - do we need to locate an agency? Do we need a lawyer? The process is a little overwhelming and anyone with ANY advice would be great!!

Thanks and the best of luck to everyone!!

spookycyster · 08-03-2004, 11:36 AM

Hello,

I would contact some of the agencies in your area and either talk with them or have an information packet sent to you. See if any of the agencies will be hosting an adoption fair/forum soon. Those are a good source for information and often, adoptive parents are there for you to speak with about the agency and their experience. Of course, it's going to be biased in that they are going to have those with good success speak, but still, maybe it will be helpful. Check the internet and look at adoption agencies on line.

You will need a lawyer to finalize the adoption if you go thru an agency or not. If you go thru a lawyer for adoption itself, they will likely handle all your paperwork for you.

I chose our agency because my friend is involved with it. It was a great choice. We have nothing but wonderful wonderful things to say about our agency and about our social worker.

Best of luck to you!

momto2 · 08-03-2004, 06:41 PM

AlisonJ- Congratulations on your decision to adopt! I am mom to two beautiful kids adopted from Korea. When I think back to when we were just starting the journey, I remember reading as many books on the subject as possible and I really liked Adoption for Dummies because it presented all types of adoption and helps you to become familiar with adoption lingo.
I also started taking notes and gathering info such as the information packets sent to me by local agencies and kept it in a binder-it somehow made me feel more organized and also made me feel like I was doing something constructive. I knew that if I was pregnant, I would have been reading all the pregnancy books and keeping a journal, so why not do it for my adoption? Now it has become a special keepsake for my kids-the story of how we became a family.
We also attended some adoption seminars at nearby agencies(which many agencies give once a month or so). It was there that we were really able to talk to parents of adopted children and from there we decided international adoption (Korea) was right for us.
We did not need a lawyer for our international adoption. If that is the option you choose, most agencies hand walk you through the entire process (lots of paperwork lol!) for the adoption and finalization process.
I wish you the best of luck on and know that with adoption, there really is a baby at the end of the journey!!

Call some agencies today!!

Best wishes,
Jen

Delila · 08-03-2004, 09:15 PM

AlisonJ- Congratulations on your decision to adopt. We recently were in the same position as you. I am still very much in the begining stages. I would start with the home study. You will need that with either a domestic or international adoption. It takes about 2-3 months to complete. We decided to go with a lawyer not an agency and pursue a domestic adoption. It is more expensive but we are hoping to get quicker results since we are very interested in a newborn. I know alot of these cysters went with an agency for both domestic and foreign adoptions. They will be a tremendous help to you no matter what you decide.
Good luck.
Delila