Dear Katie
I think I share in your frustration, just like all of us.
The thing I struggle with most is the frustration, the way this damn PCOS can control my life.
I've only been diagnosed a few months ago, but been trying for that baby for much much longer - just like you. In Jan I had my first cyst - from the clomid - I'm skinny so it makes me hyper stimulate - it was so painful, i was scheduled for a laprascopy - but it burst a day before. i don't know if it was from all the praying - as i am dead scared of an op. For me I feel like i am still at the start of my PCOS journey, i havent had my first positive yet, and how many will I have to go through before i get there. - If I ever get a positive.
I think where ever we are in our journey against PCOS - whether its just diagnosed, cyst, losing weight, ttc, misscarriage,losing our hair, or our first beautiful baby - We will always be fighters! I hate this PCOS, but you know what - God meant for me to have it - I dont know why yet, but there must be a reason - Even if it makes me a fighter - So yes i do think going through all this hell is worth it - because at the end of the day you only get stronger - dont let this beat you! Women are incredibly strong beings, We can overcome all odds.this is going to make all of us better mothers!
The thing that keeps me going at the moment is that God must have a plan - I have stopped my meds - because i feel that if i mess with nature by taking all these supliments - nature kicks back in the form of cysts. - which is soooo painful. I'm not going to sit on my bum either - im out there running for the first time - focussing on improving other areas of my life - i have become fit, i am eating better, i changed career's all because i want to get my life in order to be able to fight better!
i hate this PCOS, but if it werent for it, i would not be out there fighting against it, becoming a stronger person - improving myself and my life. And who knows mabey someday when I've got it all together God will reward us with a baby - as we are then only prepared for him or her.
God has a plan - always believe that! and if you are not religious, believe in fate - Everyone has a path in life - we just dont know where its going to take us.
i have even considered seeing a fortune teller, because I want to know if I will have my babies - but you know what - life is a journey and everything happens for a reason. i might want my babies now, but their souls arent ready yet to come down to earth. ( Hey you babies, up there, get your butts out of heaven already! your Mommies and Daddies are waiting!!)
Patience is a virtue all PCOS cysters need in excess!!
Keep strong, Keep fighting, and most of all keep faith!!! Just believe and it will happen!
Lots of hugs to all of you!!! | 
