no one understands what it's like to have hirutism...
I'm just sooo frustrated lately!
No one seems to understand what I'm going through with all this hair on me. Whenever I try to explain it to my family or tell them I'm feeling stressed and especially frustrated about it... I just get this sort of "ok you're hairy...so what?!" response...
And then I just feel that much more depressed and alone... I was wondering if anyone else here goes through that...or am I the only one....
It just frustrates me even more...because they just don't get it! I'm not SUPPOSED to have this much hair..and it just keeps getting worse and worse... I don't want it to get to the point where I have to laser every inch of my body! Everyone just has this attitude that "it's not that big of a deal...No you don't have hirutism you're just naturally VERY hairy." It's sooooo frustrating!
Lately I've started pulling out the hair (ON MY HEAD!) because I'm soo at the end of my rope, not being able to take it between the hair....and the "you're just naturally VERY hairy" comments...
well GEE why don't you just go ahead and tell me "well you're just naturally VERY ugly!"
I guess the bottom line is having all this hair just makes me feel really ugly and gross....the people closest to me are just being soo uncompassionate..it's like more salt in my wounds..
__________________ * * *Marisa* * *
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*sigh* that WAS my weight loss.. right now I'm about 10lbs heavier.. I'm a college student trying to get back there.. trying!! really trying!
i'm surprised no one responded to this yet. well, you're not alone in all this. i go through major depression about once every 2 to 4 months...major depression where i won't leave my bed or house, i don't want my boyfriend to touch me, let alone look at me. he's supportive, but he lacks the understanding part. he gets easily frustrated with me making comments about myself, or about the hair. i call myself gross and he gets mad. but if he could walk in my shoes for one day, i think he'd be able to understand what i go through day to day, from the shaving of my face (even though i'm a freaking girl and should not be shaving my face) to the looks i get from people who are rude, insesitive or ignorant. it's a journey every single day, and it takes a lot of strenghth to just get through it. the people around you should be supportive and understanding and positive about you and your hairy situations. they should toss the "deal with it" attitude because it doesn't go anyone any good. i know, it tears you down! so, i just wanted to let you know you're not alone with this and good luck with dealing with them!
__________________ "All the freaky people make the beauty of the world" Michael Franti of the band spearhead.
I will keep you in my thoughts.....I also deal with this problem. My family (the ones that know anyway) are very supportive. I am very lucky in the fact that my uncle is a Dr. and gives me free laser treatments every month. It is such a hard thing to grasp I know. I dont know how long you have been dealing with it but I have for a very long time and your attitude just changes with time....you get a "thats good enough" attitude. Hopefully that is the same for you in the future.
If you ever need to talk, please feel free to PM me.
I know way too well how you feel. I am looking into getting laser hair removal but it's quite costly. Financially it's really not doable for most people, so finding a fix is tough. Especially when the so-called fix doesn't last long!
Sorry you are going throug this.
__________________ Currently supplementing with:
-Flaxseed Oil
-Cinnamon
-Chromium Piconilate
-Cal/Mag/VitD
Undergoing treatment for PCOS, IR, Adenomyosis
attempting to avoid hysterectomy
"No one understands what it's like to have hirutism..."
I completely agree. It's emotionally draining. So far there has been nothing that I can do that will make me feel confident enough to walk with my head high. This past year I have been walking with my head down, trying to distance myself from any potential social interactions. I am fine with my friends, the ones that I have known for years, but when it comes to new people I just don't feel like taking the risk.
My family and friends do not know just how much this bothers me. I suffer in silence. How can I possibly explain hirutism to someone when they have no idea what it's like to look into the mirror and see hundreds of dark course hairs growing from their neck? I try not to let the excess facial hair bother me because it doesn't define who I am, but to a certain extent, it's sorta controlling who I am.
My next step is getting some laser hair removal. It may work or it may not. At this point, I'm willing to try just about anything to feel confident again.
i do know how you feel.. i've had this problem since i was like 12.
i think somtimes people just dont know what to say, and they may be thinking you want reassurance from them that it doesnt bother them, so they think they're doing that by downplaying it or telling you it doesnt matter. when really, if you're like me, the most helpfull thing anyone can really say is that they agree that i shouldn't have to go through somthing like this and that it's not that im naturaly hairy it has to be somthing being off.
somtimes people can be really supportive and know what to say, but other people (guys especially) might have to be told really bluntly/specificly how to support you when you need it.
I have the same problem!! See I think even if I didnt have PCOS, I would still be a little hairy, just nowhere near as much as I have now. We have all European blood in us, Serbian, Italian, and German lines, so I was destined to have tweezers as my best friend, LOL
Its frustrating because when I voice my concern to some of my family members, they act like its no big deal, and I just want to scream! I worry about going out without taking a quick look in the mirror first to make sure that the hairs on my neck havent sprouted, and that goes the same for if someone were to come over out of the blue. I also HATE it when my DH touches my chin in a loving matter. He doesn' care he says, but I would think that any guy would be kinda grossed out by that - but thats just my poor self esteem talking too, of course.
So, NO you aren't alone!!! But please, don't stress yourself out so much by family and friends and pull your hair out! Ouch!
__________________ Me (28) To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. DH (35) PCOS - Borderline IR TTC #1 - 7 years
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I know what you mean, I thought for a long time I would never find anyone to love me because I jad facial hair. Then, when I started dating a friend who I have known for 10 years, he changed my way of thinking about it. He told me that my facial hair was part of me and he loved every part of me. I can't tell you what a difference it has made in just accepting what I can't change.
I never let him touch my face at first, now I do and he actually thanked me for letting him do it.
What has really helped in my overall health is that I have lost 60+ pounds in about a year doing the atkins diet. My period has returned to normal, I dont grow hair as fast, and I feel soooo much better.
I am thankful for this website and all of you who understand what shaving your face everyday is like.
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I have been hairy since about the age of 8 years old... throughout school life i got the usual "hairy comments", and the time i did shave my legs, the comments were no better.... ignorent people who have nothing else better to do than think they are perfect are the ones with the problem, because we dont fit into their narrow minded perfect normal world.... and as we all know, normal can mean different things to people, for me being hairy is normal. My friends like me for who i am, which includes me being hairy, doesnt bother them in the slightest, people i meet for the first time, if they say oh you are hairy, i explain why, then it's up to them what they do with that information.. i used to get upset about it.
I came to the conclusion a few years ago, I am hairy and i shave everyday (since the age of 14,) doctors have said even without pcos and the higher testosterone i would still be hairy... what is wrong with women being hairy... we were born with it, who turned around and said "hey women are to be hairless and men are to be hairy" .. i have male friends who are very hairless, my hair is me, i dont bother shaving it, occasionally my legs in the summer, and under my arms as sometimes it ingrows there and that is uncomfortable.
I know that shaving is a pain and hair removal can be very expensive, whether going for treatments or even buying off the shelf hair removing stuff, but if it helps your self esteem its worth it.. you are amongst friends here who all understand what you are going through, and you are not alone. I was diagnosed back in 1981 and it wasnt until about 4 years ago that i met anyone that had heard of pcos and had it, then i found this site.
__________________ -------------------------------------------
45(feels like 99 some days)
Dx - pcos 1982
Dx - diabetes 2 1999,
Tx - metformin slow release 2000mg. Insulin 5 times a day
Loads of other medications.
------------------------------- What is a friend?A single soul dwelling in two bodies.
Aristotle...
I am with all of you on this matter. my mother is an OB nurse and should have know about this(as a matter of fact she did and never said anything to me until I was dx.) She would make fun of me and tell me I had better marry a man that was harrier than me! We are also from Eurpean decent...major itialian and german!! I learned about plucking, waxing, and bleaching from my grandma...(since my mom had practically no hair in odd places, heck her legs are still blonde and she 45 years old) I think the "normal people" just need a reason to pick on anyone that's different...they'll get theirs someday!
In my experience my family acted the same. I guess because they don't know what else to do. Even doctors for years weren't proactive in helping me. I took the initative in getting laser treatments, everywhere. I took out loans to do it and its been a year and I'm still paying it off. Thank God I have a job but in my situation its been working out. I feel good about even though the nurses say it may come back. So, if I were you I would start looking at all the places that specialize in laser treatments and if you are willing to pay for it.
Sometimes growing up I would look in the mirror and know even at an early age something wasn't right. I thought I looked more like a boy than a girl. I thought my voice was deeper than all the girls. I hated it. Now I have facial hairs, and nipple hairs. It's horrible, because it's getting worse and I do not have the money for laser hair treatment. I'm not even working right now. I don't want to leave the house, most days and my husband does all the shopping etc. It's so frustrating and depressing. I just sit at home all day wishing I was normal. I don't have anyone in my life besides my husband who understands me. I just thank god everyday that I have him. I'm so frustrated with life right now, I'm not sure what to do to cope. Nothing seems like it is going to get better. (Sorry I just needed to vent.)
I just ordered a bunch of herbs recommended from a sticky on here. So I'm going to try Black Cohosh, false unicorn root, chaste tree, saw palmetto, dandelion, and black currant oil. I'll be taking the minimum dose everyday for a year and will post the results. I am also going to try Diane 35 instead of yasmin. Wish me luck.
Sometimes growing up I would look in the mirror and know even at an early age something wasn't right. I thought I looked more like a boy than a girl. I thought my voice was deeper than all the girls. I hated it. Now I have facial hairs, and nipple hairs. It's horrible, because it's getting worse and I do not have the money for laser hair treatment. I'm not even working right now. I don't want to leave the house, most days and my husband does all the shopping etc. It's so frustrating and depressing. I just sit at home all day wishing I was normal. I don't have anyone in my life besides my husband who understands me. I just thank god everyday that I have him. I'm so frustrated with life right now, I'm not sure what to do to cope. Nothing seems like it is going to get better. (Sorry I just needed to vent.)
You've got a husband who loves you.
And you can get a grip on the problem, too -- it's not so hard to get the mastery of it. Get a good men's-type electric razor. I use a Philips Norelco rotary-head one. Shave every morning and nobody'll be any the wiser other than you and your dh.
I know exactly how you all feel (except for you, JoyBlack! ) I'm feeling extremely sad and depressed lately. I feel like we have this because God hates us. I feel like I need one good reason why I shouldn't just kill myself. I'm 51 yrs old and my whole life has been one trauma after another. I think we have nightmares about this because we're traumatized. I fell in love 18 years ago, but let him get away because I feel so gross. I've been pining for him for 18 years. I feel like if God is Love, then why did he put this obstacle in my way to keep me from being with the person I want to be with? I've written to Kat, and she never wrote me back. I post messages on here and people ignore me. I'm turning into an alcoholic, just like my dad. I have 2 schizophrenic adult sons who live with us and drive me crazy. My mom was schizophrenic. My dad was a rageaholic alcoholic. I had to be rushed to the hospital back in December because I mixed all my meds with alcohol. One of my sons had to call an ambulance. I heard him ask the paramedics "Is my mom going to die?" I have OCD, depression, PTSD from a very abusive childhood. My siblings and I were not allowed to have friends and were forced to wear the same clothes every day. We were horribly bullied every day because of that. God took away the only thing I had going for me - my looks.
Joy - you're such a huge help to everyone here. I would love to see a picture of you, if that's okay with you.
no one understands what it's like to have hirutism... 
He doesn' care he says, but I would think that any guy would be kinda grossed out by that - but thats just my poor self esteem talking too, of course.
) I'm feeling extremely sad and depressed lately. I feel like we have this because God hates us. I feel like I need one good reason why I shouldn't just kill myself. I'm 51 yrs old and my whole life has been one trauma after another. I think we have nightmares about this because we're traumatized. I fell in love 18 years ago, but let him get away because I feel so gross. I've been pining for him for 18 years. I feel like if God is Love, then why did he put this obstacle in my way to keep me from being with the person I want to be with? I've written to Kat, and she never wrote me back. I post messages on here and people ignore me. I'm turning into an alcoholic, just like my dad. I have 2 schizophrenic adult sons who live with us and drive me crazy. My mom was schizophrenic. My dad was a rageaholic alcoholic. I had to be rushed to the hospital back in December because I mixed all my meds with alcohol. One of my sons had to call an ambulance. I heard him ask the paramedics "Is my mom going to die?" I have OCD, depression, PTSD from a very abusive childhood. My siblings and I were not allowed to have friends and were forced to wear the same clothes every day. We were horribly bullied every day because of that. God took away the only thing I had going for me - my looks. 
