Not Depressed--but therapy question nonetheless-hope here is the place to stick it...

theflyingturtle · 05-19-2005, 12:39 AM

Hi All,

I'm not depressed but I have some "issues" I feel I need to confront in order to be the best person I can be.

I was in and out of therapy as a kid and HATED it and the stigma I felt being forced into it.

I think I am ready to "trust the process" and I have searched through some places on the internet about chicago area therapists.

Question--what's the difference between seeing a psychologist and a social worker as a "counselor?"

Here are the "issues" I'd like to deal with in case this helps.

1) Being able to communicate better with others. In times of extreeme frustration I "shut down" and cry or keep all my thoughts inside. I lose the ability to talk through a problem without sitting down and writing my thoughts out, usually at that point the situation is way over and not worth bringing up again. I still feel unresolved about the situation at hand though.

2) I am a perfectionist in some ways, but I am very disorganized at the same time. I live in a world of clutter and have never had a sense of organization. I was that kid that could help anyone else organize their stuff but spent recess indoors fixing and "dumping" my desk.

3) I would love to actually have the knowledge of the world of dating. I've never had a boyfriend and I am 25 years old. It's something that I want but I don't know how to get there and feel very sexually immature, which makes me feel like I know even less about the world of dating.

4) I come from a family (mom's side) of bad communicators, emotionally abusive, and addictive personalities. I want to "rewire" myself so to speak and change the patterns so that I do not find myself following in their footsteps. I don't speak to my mom--she's literally to crazy for me to deal with and I had enough years of her abuse. When I was 19 I was home right after freshman year and she became physically abusive, never stepped a foot in her house since. Though the emotional trauma has still taken a toll on my daily functioning, as far has how I communicate with those around me. See above.

Any thoughts are appreciated.

Constance · 05-19-2005, 01:12 AM

one is cheaper than the other?
I hope you get if fixed. I went to a psychologist as a child and felt he connected to me better than the counsler. He specialized in my problem while the counsler mainly just wanted me to talk. I did not want to talk! I was molested and felt dirty and want die. I would write notes of why i did not why i did not want to live and hide them around the house. my pshchologist would tell me how i was feeling and ask me to confirm or deni. Really no amount of the reapy helped me as much as my relationship with God. It took me a long time to talk to him but it has truly helped. Most churches can lead you to a good person to talk to even if you are not religous. I hope i have helped.

pink76mom · 05-19-2005, 05:48 PM

Theflyingturtle-
Hello. It is really great that you are looking to straighten your "issues" out now. Unfortunately, I have seen many professionals ove the course of my life time. This is the insight that I can offer...
Therapists come with many different titles, PhD, MSW, LISW, LMHC, and the list can go on. What really matters is what you are looking for. Man or woman? They all have a but different demeanor and approaches. I would ask others and/or your physician for a few recomendations. Then call them, see if they are taking new patients (and how hard is it to get in for return appts!), the hours that they work (evening appts?) if that is an issue for you, do they work a lot with the things that you are looking to work on, etc. You may have to try a few before you find one that you truly connect with.
As a child, we had some abuse in our home and I was in therapy then. Now, I return periodically as things come up. I need help processing sometimes, especially when major things come up. I can really relate to your #1 reason, which is why I return when I need to. My natural reaction is to stuff and shut down, so I am always aware of that and I strive to remain emotionally balanced. Sometimes our life situations end up making us work harder than we want. Life is a process. My therapist jokes that I am the healthiest "patient" she has ever had

I got my degree and used to do skills counseling with adolescents but quit when my daughter was born.
Psychologists are generally much pricier, but some insurance plans only cover then and not other counselors. Check your insurance if you have coverage
Good luck. If I can answer any more specific questions please let me know.

PS. I am only 5" tall and also have a continual struggle with my weight, but it looks like you are doing pretty good in that are

I am currently having much success with weight watchers.

psychobabyjb · 05-23-2005, 06:49 PM

As a psychologist myself, I figured I'd add my two cents worth. Yes, it's true psychologists are generally pricier that Social Workers or Counselors. Generally, that's because they've gone to school longer (doctorate training) and gotten more specialized training in a specific area, although some counselors will have a doctorate as well and the specialized training. There are good therapist/counselors at every education level, under all the different specializations, but really what it comes down to is finding someone that works for you. Therapy is so dependent on the compatability of the personalities of therapist/client, choosing someone with a style you like is often the primary issue. Don't be afraid to talk to several therapists at length on the phone and then pick one you think you'd like. Also, don't be afraid to seek out another one if the one you pick just doesn't work.

Your mental health is important. If you can afford it, go to someone that is more specialized, with more education and experience, ultimately I believe they will be more effective at helping you (although this isn't always the case). Sometimes the old adage really is true, you get what you pay for. It's also important to find a therapist that is flexible enough to "think outside the box" otherwise they'll always try to stick you in one. It's unfortunate that you were forced into therapy as a kid and came to resent the experience. I've been in therapy as well as being the therapist, it can be a beneficial and rewarding experience when you're truly ready to explore your "stuff." Hope this helped. Good luck.
Jennifer