Playing God??

spikasum · 09-21-2009, 03:45 PM

I often find myself wondering about whether I am playing God by using fertility treatments. Anyone else struggle with this? I tell myself that maybe I am just not having enough faith. God can do anything right? Am I wrong to "help him out"? How do you know it's the right thing to do?

Happy Wife · 09-21-2009, 04:25 PM

I like to belive that God gave us the doctors and their knowledge to be able to help us.

I was always told God gives us challenges he knows we can handle. I truely belive this after what I have been through in this past year (very looooong story) I also believe this is a way for God so show me how much I really do want a child. There have been times even since we started ttc that I have been unsure. I became 100% convinced last night that this is what I want. I have been unable to ovulate on my own and just did my first cycle of clomid. Last night I got my blood test results from Friday to check my progesterone levels to see if I ovulated. The levels were good this time indicating I did. I actually began to cry. I was so happy because this meant I still have a chance to get pregnant. This reaction made me realize that I really do want to be a mother. After last nights reaction I can't imagie how I am going to be when I get my first BFP!

mat301998 · 09-21-2009, 11:07 PM

God can do anything! It's up to us pray, make our requests known and leave the rest to God as He decides to respond. I've often heard that God answers prayers with a yes, no or not now/not this way/not by this method. So, we have been blessed with doctors specializing in most everything imaginable. We seek doctor's opinions and medical care plans. But many Chrisitains pray for their own guidance in seeking a doctor and pray for their doctors (especially if surgery is pending!). Many doctors pray for themselves and their patients. It is my opinion that if God intends for someone to conceive, carry and deliver a baby, it will happen--whether by medical assistance or not. For after all, God uses people to bring about His mission and will here on earth.

I don't think anyone is playing God or helping Him out. I think it's a matter of preference how someone desires to become a parent, through medical assistance or an adoption agency or whatever other method. I believe it will only successful if it is God's will.

Anonykat · 09-21-2009, 11:41 PM

It's no more playing God to help your ovaries function properly than it is to take insulin when your pancreas isn't functioning properly.

Ajani · 09-22-2009, 10:24 AM

I don't believe for a moment that there is a single person on this planet who was NOT created by God. Doctors put the pieces together, but only God breathes life into them to create a baby. The bible is clear that God knew each one of us before we were conceived. Each and every one of us. No exceptions, no exclusions.

pinkkitty · 09-30-2009, 10:20 PM

The concept that God controls the womb is greatly used in the bible. I have read devotionals that compare surrogacy to what Sarah and Abraham did. That its the same thing, and its wrong. But i would rather think that sex with a woman other then his wife might have been the part that was wrong.

If your sick, you take medication to fix it. Clomid or other such drugs cant make a conception happen, grow and be born. It only gets us to do what most other women get once a month.

There is also the other end of the scale, women who do nothing and expect God to heal them - that is testing God and wrong!

its a difficult one, God has him timing. Efforts to ttc can be futile if it isnt his time, so somehow we need to learn pray and listen, to be patient, humble and keep God as #1 in our lives. Sometimes that can be the hardest thing in the world when maternal instinct kicks in.

WifeyC · 10-04-2009, 10:49 PM

DH's side of the family questions this. They have thought that I've been trying to play God for 8 months now that I've been on Clomid. And now, I'm moving on to injectables. They question if I'm openly defying the will of God. The reality is that my body doesn't function without the medication to assist it. I don't O on my own and sometimes, I don't mature eggs on my own. I'm no more playing God by taking these medications than those who take medications to regulate other functions of their body. I take the medications to regulate my ovarian function. It doesn't make me play God. It just helps my body get what it needs to work right. I believe God gave us the doctors and the medication to help us.

Anonykat · 10-04-2009, 11:45 PM

Ya know... our bodies NEED to have cycles in order to be healthy. Even if you're not TTC, you should still be taking steps to have AF occasionally - it's not good for your body to go years and years and years without ever cycling - it greatly increases the risk of uterine cancer, for one thing. Would the same people whining about others taking drugs to conceive whine about others using drugs to keep healthy? Would they say, "Never ever take meds to produce a cycle. You were meant to have uterine cancer someday." Likely not. So why is it okay to take meds to make our bodies do what they're supposed to do, but it's not okay to do those same things if you're hoping it also produces a child?

Whether they call it "God" or "fate" or "nature", people who presume to tell other people that they're messing with some grand design have got a lot of nerve. What makes such buttinskys think THEY have some special pipeline into God's will, nature's plan, whatever, to tell others "you weren't meant to do this"? Are they calling themselves omniscient, that they can know such unfathomable things? Telling someone that YOU know what their life's plan was meant to be is pompous, and then that they're screwing that plan up by trying to have a child, is just plain assy.

And what do they tell children who were conceived with medical help - "You were never meant to be"? "You shouldn't exist"? I defy anyone to spend 5 minutes with my beautiful, sweet, smart, compassionate 3 year old twins and tell me they should not have been conceived, just because I had to pop some pills and have some shots to ovulate.

Stacie M · 10-05-2009, 01:00 AM

I believe God gave us tools to make our lives healthier and happier. I don't believe using fertility treatments defies God's will at all. IMHO, if God truly didn't want you to get PG (maybe because he has a different plan for you), you wouldn't whether you use fertility treatments or not.

I had someone tell me once that using Clomid was going against God's will for me. I told them that they were entitled to their opinion, but would they tell a heart attack patient that seeking treatment was going against God's will, and maybe having a heart attack meant God wanted them to die? I think not...

Happy Wife · 10-05-2009, 01:04 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Stacie M

I believe God gave us tools to make our lives healthier and happier. I don't believe using fertility treatments defies God's will at all. IMHO, if God truly didn't want you to get PG (maybe because he has a different plan for you), you wouldn't whether you use fertility treatments or not.

I had someone tell me once that using Clomid was going against God's will for me. I told them that they were entitled to their opinion, but would they tell a heart attack patient that seeking treatment was going against God's will, and maybe having a heart attack meant God wanted them to die? I think not...

Good point
My husband takes pills everyday to keep his heart beating properly what is the difference between him taking his pills and I taking clomid to regulate my ovarian function?

DiamondInTheRough · 10-05-2009, 01:05 AM

What is wrong with taking a medication to help your body function properly? Getting pregnant, whether you hope to or not, is secondary really. I think if you look at it that way, it's much easier to accept. There should not be any guilt over getting pregnant as a result of OVULATION

spikasum · 10-07-2009, 11:53 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Happy Wife

I like to belive that God gave us the doctors and their knowledge to be able to help us.

I was always told God gives us challenges he knows we can handle. I truely belive this after what I have been through in this past year (very looooong story) I also believe this is a way for God so show me how much I really do want a child. There have been times even since we started ttc that I have been unsure. I became 100% convinced last night that this is what I want. I have been unable to ovulate on my own and just did my first cycle of clomid. Last night I got my blood test results from Friday to check my progesterone levels to see if I ovulated. The levels were good this time indicating I did. I actually began to cry. I was so happy because this meant I still have a chance to get pregnant. This reaction made me realize that I really do want to be a mother. After last nights reaction I can't imagie how I am going to be when I get my first BFP!

Thank you for your honest awnser. Good luck to you in your journey! Can't wait to hear about a BFP!!!

spikasum · 10-07-2009, 11:55 AM

I agree with you all! Thank you so much for helping me sort things out in my crazy mind! I feel for myself it is resonable to take the clomid for now and see what happens. God will do what he thinks needs to happen no matter what I do. Thanks again! God Bless you all.

texasgirl115 · 10-14-2009, 10:40 AM

Hey! I agree with all of you that fertility drugs are not "going against God's will." I was, however, wondering what ya'll think about things like IVF. As a Catholic, I would not go this route in trying to get pregnant, and it seems to me that anyone who is pro-life has to agree that it is not moral (because of the likely destruction of some of the embryos created). In theory, this is my opinion and belief, and I think I have thought about the consequences and formed a very rational opinion. However, I have a VERY, VERY hard time faulting people who actually go through this process. Part of this is because of my own intense desire to have children, which has at times caused me to think that if all else fails, I might try it. Now that I know more, I am pretty confident I would never do IVF, both because I've considered the moral difficulties of it more, and because I used to sort of see it as pretty much the only way of getting pregnant with a PCOS diagnosis, and now I know different. Still, sort of like one of you said about someone talking with your daughter and saying it is wrong to use fertility drugs, I have a cousin who has had three babies through IVF and I'm particularly close with her oldest daughter, who I adore. These are beautiful, sweet, loving, intelligent children who just seem like little miracles to me, and it just makes me feel so conflicted about IVF sometimes. I know the Church would never advocate saying that the children were not "meant to be," yet how could you teach these girls about the immorality of IVF without conveying some sort of similar message? I would be really interested to know what anyone else thinks about this, and if anyone has had similar feelings.

Anonykat · 10-14-2009, 10:58 AM

I'm not Catholic, but Eastern Orthodox, but our views on pro-life issues are similar. There are ways to do IVF that still respect life, most notably by simply not creating too many embryos to begin with. I know two couples who are very prolife who simply refused to create more embryos than children they were willing to eventually have.

I believe it can be a grey area for those who take a strong moral stand on some of these issues, but entered into prayerfully and with great sobriety of mind, understanding the gravity of the issue, I believe one can do IVF and still be faithful to the prolife ethos. I am lucky that less invasive interventions have worked for us and that I haven't had to confront these issues personally, but it is my view that God is the giver of all life, whether medically assisted or not. All children that come into existence were meant to be.

I don't think that anyone should be teaching those girls about "the immorality of IVF", but rather how science and medicine can be used or misused - how something live-giving and good can become twisted if used without caution. IVF can be one of these things, but does not have to be. I do know that your faith takes a stricter view on assisted reproduction than mine does in general, so perhaps not all of these statements will apply to your view, but this is how I see it.