Ok, I am caving for the first time to anyone really about this, but it's becoming debilitating.
I've ALWAYS been a very cheerful, happy person. In January that all changed for me. My dad died very very unexpectedly. I've always been very strong and able to deal with loss, but losing him has been by far the hardest thing I've ever gone through. My extended family has been of absolute no support, in fact the only time they contact me, my mom, or my younger brother is to get juicy gossip to tell everyone how hard we're taking it. I feel bad sharing my pain with my mom and brother because they're hurting really bad too (my little brother actually found my dad laying dead in the shower after what drs said was a massive heart attack).
Now I'm 6 months pregnant and overly emotional from all the hormones. Every little thing that reminds me of dad makes me break down in tears. I've been locking myself in my office for little bits at a time to just cry. I can barely take a shower without crying because I think of how my dad died in the shower. And I get so worked up I end up throwing up because I can't breath from sobbing so hard.
The only thing I think that is keeping me going is this little one growing inside of me. Everytime I think I've hit my lowest low, the baby kicks and remind me there is new life and hope in the horizon. But I can't keep on like this. I think at my next ob appointment I am going to ask for help, but I want to be informed about what my options are. Any suggestions or tips? My next appt is August 24th, so any suggestions on how to get through the next 3 weeks would be great too.
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Brooke (27) To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. DH (27)
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Oh, bless your heart sweetie! I am so sorry you're having to go through this. I know the loss of a parent must be devastating. I think you should definitely discuss this with your ob. I'm sure there are some options with medication even while you're pregnant.
I'm so sorry for your loss It is completely normal to be upset and to grieve, so please don't be so hard on yourself. There are some medications that you can take while pregnant, and another thing to keep in mind is that if you are already depressed while pregnant, you may be more prone to Post Partum Depression.
I recommend seeing a psychiatrist if you are able to. They will be more familiar with the proper medications and dosages for a pregnant woman than an OB, and it is also someone that you can share your thoughts/feelings with.
Good luck, hang in there!
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Oh hun, you have so much on your plate right now. I can't even imagine losing my parent right now (you and I are close in age). I am so sorry for your loss and it is perfectly normal for you to grieve. Being pregnant and hormonal is intensifying your situation. Personally, I wouldn't discount using your Mom and Brother to lean on. They are the people to most likely understand what you are going through completely. You all might even be able to help each other heal. Have you tried to sit down and talk to them? You might be surprised to find out they were worried about coming to you for the same reasons you are worried about going to them. As you said, each kick from your baby is a reminder of new life and hope...the baby could help you all heal. It's going to take time, take it day by day.
As for waiting until your next appointment, if you are having that hard of a time right now I wouldn't wait personally. Call you ob and explain let them know how you are feeling and how upset you are right now. A good doctor won't make you wait three weeks to get help if you are that depressed. If nothing else he can give you your referral now so that you can work on getting in to see a psychiatrist. Hang in there!
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I just want to echo all that. make sure you see someone who knows what you can take (obviously) but also someone who understands depression in pregnancy and, as was mentioned, post partum depression.
It is an overwhelming fact that most people don't get help, and suffer unecessarily.
This is not your fault in any way, you're experiencing something that can get better with a doctor's care. I recommend that you don't wait - you make it a priority to find out what help you can get.
I'm so sorry for your loss I tend to group experiences together, too, as in, if I see something that reminds me of something sad or stressful I go into full on panic attacks and it has been SO MUCH WORSE with pregnancy!! I guess I just wanted to say that you are going through the grieving process and it is NORMAL (even if it's miserable at times)
I just wanted to say that I am so sorry for your loss. I lost my brother in 2004 to an auto accident and I still have my good days and my bad days. I agree with everyone else, call your doctor and let them know that you are hurting deep down inside and see if they can help you sooner than your appointment. I know the one thing that keeps me going on after my brothers death is the fact that I know that he knew how much I loved him and that he would want me to get up everyday and live my life and not feel bad because he was gone. He left behind three of the most wonderful children and I know that he wants me to keep his memory alive and that is what we do and I urge you to do the same thing when your sweet baby is born. Let he/she know that they have a wonderful grandfather in heaven that loves them very much. So please call your doctor and get some help! I hope that your family heals from this soon.
God bless you and your family,
Kristi
__________________ Kristi (29) DH Eric (33)
Married 10/22/99 8 years
TTC #1 since 10/26/99---BFP 2/22/06
DX 11/11/05
OMG have we lost our minds??? We are TTC #2!!!!
11/18/07- CD 1 Giving soy 160mg a try!!!!
Collin Jerl was born 10/25/06 8 pounds 9 oz and 20 inches!!!!!!!!
Pregnant, mourning, and depression 
It is completely normal to be upset and to grieve, so please don't be so hard on yourself. There are some medications that you can take while pregnant, and another thing to keep in mind is that if you are already depressed while pregnant, you may be more prone to Post Partum Depression.
Oh hun, you have so much on your plate right now. I can't even imagine losing my parent right now (you and I are close in age). I am so sorry for your loss and it is perfectly normal for you to grieve. Being pregnant and hormonal is intensifying your situation. Personally, I wouldn't discount using your Mom and Brother to lean on. They are the people to most likely understand what you are going through completely. You all might even be able to help each other heal. Have you tried to sit down and talk to them? You might be surprised to find out they were worried about coming to you for the same reasons you are worried about going to them. As you said, each kick from your baby is a reminder of new life and hope...the baby could help you all heal. It's going to take time, take it day by day. 
