Question for other Christians

Jakes_Angel · 09-17-2007, 05:31 AM

I got saved as an adult and six years later still feel as though I havent found my place in God's will. I do a lot of reading and have found a writer that I seem to agree with for the most part about raising children and how to deal with problems and so forth. Her name is Debi Pearl. However many of the things she talks about seem to me like Amish or Menonite traditions and Upon continued reading I realised that she is indeed Amish.

My question is how many out there know about Amish and agree with their beliefs for the most part?

I even to a degree agree with the lack of modern "nessecities(sp?)" I would love to learn how to live with out needing a microwave and how to make my own clothes. Sometimes I think that maybe that is the way God intended things. But then I know that I couldn't live without my computer-it's how my husband and I stay in touch when he is out. All of this kinda confuses me because I agree with so much that they believe. I by all means am not saying that Amish are not the right way or vice versa that modern beliefs aren't correct. I am jsut kinda confused. Many ppl feel that I am too conservative.

Please any input (as long as you arent putting me or anyone else down) is appreciated.

God Bless,
Missy

Jashobeam · 09-17-2007, 02:18 PM

There are some Mennonite cysters on this board who could answer some of your questions. Most cysters on this board do not agree with the Pearls, so before you post make sure to put a note in that you don't want a heated debate.

I read a lot of Amish fiction, but there are only some Amish churches that actually believe in getting saved. The rest rely on works. From what I understand the born again Amish and the Mennonites witness to the other Amish. I think there are 2 Amish/Mennonite threads on this site that are open to questions about either group.

Ajani · 09-17-2007, 03:19 PM

I'm Mennonite, but not Old Order like you're reffering to. And I won't say what I think of the Pearl's teachings.

Living more simply needn't be tied to any denomination. It's something that you can do on your own.

Jakes_Angel · 09-17-2007, 05:41 PM

Like I said I am just kinda curious of the ...doctrine of the two...I want to understand them more. Right now all I have is what I have read and it s more about the training of children. I really don't want to get anyone angry with anyone else or even in a debate...I jsut want facts.
I think more then anything I jsut appreciate the fact that they teach their children to do everything on their own and not nessicarily(sp) having to buy everything. I also appreiciate the fact that they teach their children to be responsible. (I am a teacher and had some menonite children and jsut noticed how well behaved they were.-Not that other children were...it was jsut an odd site at that specific school.)

Like what is the difference between the two? What is the difference between the Old Order that Ajani spoke of and the more modern version? Please explain why you do/ donot agree witht the teachings of the Pearls. I will not take offense to anything as I am just a curious persont aht wants to learn more about both.

Also please don't take any offense to my questions. I do not mean to cause drama of any kind!!! Thank you for your answers I really appreciate them.

Ajani · 09-18-2007, 02:58 PM

Old Order Mennonites belive in being "in the world but not of it." They separate themselves from society by shunning things like hydro and in many cases cars and such. They live communally, often farming and selling their wares to the general population to make a living.

Obviously I have not shunned hydro.

I belong to a Mennonite Brethren congregation. We are anabaptists, and believe in the basic truths of Jesus as Lord and Saviour,the Trinity, etc, as well as things like pacifism and baptism upon confession of faith rather than as an infant.

As for the Pearls, I'll just say that I am a big believer in grace based discipline (GBD), rather than punitive childrearing. And GBD is foreign to the Pearls, as well as to others like them (like Gary Ezzo). If you do a search on the Mommy board for Ezzo, you'll find lots of information about him and those like him and how their philosophies can harm children. Even Dr. Dobson distances himself from their teachings.

I just cannot agree with the Pearl's on so many things, like (from their site) "A swift whack with the plastic tubing would sting but not bruise. Give 10 licks at a time, more if the child resists. Be careful about using it in front of others -- even at church; nosy neighbors might call social workers. Save hands for nurturing, not disciplining. Heed the warning, taken from Proverbs in the Old Testament, that sparing the rod will spoil the child."

I find that whole passage just sickening! And they advocate this kind of thing for babies as young as 8 months old.

*About GBD (from Gentle Christian Mothers.com)- Grace-Based Discipline is a model of discipline which, though it rejects the popular view that the rod references spankings, affirms the authority of parents as outlined in the Bible. Extending grace to our children is not permissiveness. We believe that parents are to set a high standard for behavior and children are to uphold that standard. Many gentle parents are prudent and selective about the type and number of rules they enforce. Many grace based parents enforce those rules using low coercion, cooperation, negotiation and compromise. However, GCM does not embrace the philosophy behind TCS ("Taking Children Seriously") or non-coercive parenting. True, quality discipline combines knowledge of age appropriate behaviors, reasonable standards, clear expectations, proactive discipline and consistency. Grace is extended in a parent’s willingness to help their children meet that standard when needed and to forgive when the standard is missed.

That's where I stand on the Pearls and their kind. If you want more information about them, there is a public board at Gentle Christian Mothers for just such discussion. Click here for it. That will help keep the drama off of SC, since this topic tends to be divisive and controversial.

Jakes_Angel · 09-18-2007, 04:43 PM

Thank you for explaining that. I BY FAR don't agree with hitting children...seeing as how I am a teacher...kinda have to have that view. I didnt realize that that is their whole basis. I do however agree with a strick disipline policy that both parents use.and from what I have read (for the most part) is more about the ability to disipline children.

Like I said earlier aside form the children aspect. I really like the idea of learning to do things on your own(my mother never taught me to sew or to cook from scratch) and I do wish I had the skills to teach my children that they don't have to rely on the latest fashions to have clothes or buy the already made meals because they would be able to do it themselves. Along with farming and doing all that...I guess in a way I wish I would have lived before department stores and grocery stores were so popular and before the chemicals were givien to us from birth. (ex: the chemicals used on cows to produce more milk, the pesticides used on vegetables) Just wish we coul dgo back to simpler days when family was more important then making a lot of money and having the most stylish car. LOL

I think most of this comes from me coming from a family that is big on things. "You need nice things to be well off" type of thinking has me scared to tell my parents that I will not be going back to work for a long time simply because to me...God first, then husband, then children, then work-> not work then family. And with DH in the military it is much harder to keep family life stable for a child. anyhow I am getting way off the subject.

Thank you again for your answer I really do appreciate your imput!!!!

Crunchyandsweet · 09-21-2007, 08:46 PM

I just have to speak from a stand point of growing up in an Amish community (my family and I are/were not Amish) that I respect the Amish so much for their values, work ethic, emphasis on family and the simple life. I believe most Amish live what they learn and show it in every aspect of their lives. The Amish children I have been around are by far the most well behaved sweet little ones I have ever seen. I cant say anything about the "Pearls" as I am not familar with them, but there is alot to be learned ( in my opinion) from these "salt of the earth" simple folks.I find the Amish have alot of things right and one being that dont allow anything in their lives to take away from their family time together and that is a lesson I struggle to learn every day..

helovesme · 10-04-2007, 02:34 AM

It's very admirable that you're reading and researching to find the best way to raise your kids and seeking God's will for your life. Please remember that all those books are great tools, but God's Book is the ultimate resource for all aspects of life. If what another author is saying doesn't line up with the Bible, then it isn't God's will.

I, too, have often thought about returning to a simpler time. Even as kids, we didn't have as many electronic games to play...we were sent outside to run. I'm in the process of de-cluttering my home now to try and remove myself from the materialistic culture we live in. I'm not Amish, I was raised Southern Baptist and now attend a wonderful non-denominational church. I think a God-centered life is the best regardless of denomination. Kudos for searching for it!

kimhoffer · 10-04-2007, 02:59 AM

Some would call it legalistic but I do not kow enough about it, google it and you'll find out all you need. The bottom line is where the heart of the person is. Love jesus and people and that is what really matters.