Question for those who have done at-home insemination

sagestory · 04-28-2008, 02:29 PM

This is my first cycle back in the saddle and I'm really excited. We are using fresh sperm from a known donor. Despite the fact that I have asked DP to do very little (she is in charge of holding the cup of semen - which will be inside of a paper bag - between her legs on the ride home), she is still griping about having to handle it. I'm the one doing the lab work and injecting it into myself... I don't really think she has anything to complain about and it upsets me. I expect her to be happy to be part of the process to bring OUR child into the world. Her complaining seems really uncalled for.

So my question is... have any of you dealt with this with your partners/wives? If so, were you able to make her stop complaining about how icky sperm is or did you just ignore it? Any advice other than to just talk to her about it (which I have done)?

drchickon · 04-28-2008, 06:00 PM

Sage - My DP was so so so vocal about how grossed out she was by the sperm. I just ignored it for a while, then made little comments about her saying things like that - then finally I said, "Well, it's not your vagina that it's going into so just be glad about that!" And I was pretty short with her when I said it. She was a little more low key after that, but never stopped. So I just ignored it. I just figured that no matter what, she wasn't going to stop whining about it, so i just had to deal.

sagestory · 04-28-2008, 06:13 PM

Thanks for the advice... I think I will do best to ignore mine as well. We got into a big fight because she was griping about having to go with me to pick up the baby seeds so finally I told her just to stay home. By the time I got back, she felt soooo bad (I even get dinner out of it hehehe) and didn't say anything else negative about the process. So it's probably going to be one of those things where I don't expect too much from her and ignore the irritating bits.

Bree-and-Izy · 06-06-2008, 07:07 PM

Dude, I never complain about the golden juice. I go put tissue in my nose from fear of smelling anything... but we laugh about it. The time we conceived DD I squirted some on the floor and slipped on it after insemination. It's all good and funny... it brought us our baby and will hopefully bring us another. I'm 100% responsible for all sperm. I picked it, I get it, I inseminate it and I clean up afterwards. It's my part. I'd be sad without it. Having said that... I know this is kind of oldish but still valid. We've moved on to IUI now, with this cycle but I've done it over a dozen times proudly and I don't think it's cool to moan about it.

drchickon · 06-07-2008, 01:49 AM

Izy - Good for you! You are so good to take such an active role. When we were TTC, I picked the jizz, I arranged the shipping/delivery, I handled the storage, I even did almost all of my own inseminations. DP did two of them - the rest I did myself - which was an interesting acrobatic feat at times. Once we moved on to IUI, I went to almost every appointment alone, and had the first IUI alone. The second IUI I demanded that DP go, so she did, and that's the one that took. No illusions that it took because she was there, but I guess it was nice for her to be present for the one that worked. I was always a little disheartened that she wasn't more a part of the process...

MissChrystal · 06-07-2008, 02:41 AM

I totally don't mean to troll, but I read this thread before I realized it was a rainbow cyster section

A friend of mine has a DP whose gone through donors and such and I find it interesting how grossed out she is by male parts and what comes out of them. Even the sheer mention of a penis and she gets weird!

Just thought I'd chime in and say its not just your DP who feels weird about sperm hehe

Bree-and-Izy · 06-07-2008, 12:33 PM

dr: I recently missed my very first appointment ever. B had to get a follie scan and I had to be at another office to sign for our little guys at the same time.

I have never missed a single appointment before that, not even a checkup. I know that's unusual, but her uterus is my uterus and I feel like I have to be with it! lmao It must have been hard to inseminate yourself since it isn't very difficult to push the stuff out when you move forward. I even keep track of all things fertility and make those decisions. DW is the boss about everything else, usually has the last say about everything, but I am the boss of the babies. Most of the time she doesn't even know what CD it is. Oh well, I guess we're all different. DW actually doesn't like seeing the sperm and it goes in her, so I know she would avoid it if she could.