questions

Krisyn · 04-28-2003, 12:15 AM

DH and I have been talking about adoption. Where do you start? This is all new to us. I want to start the process now but dh is hesitant because of the cost of adoption. Do any of you ladies know where to start and if there is any financial help with adopting. Any info will be great.
thank-you
krisyn

CMJennyK · 04-28-2003, 02:44 AM

Where to start -- there are so many good agencies out there. My bias is to make sure you get one that also helps the birthmom. We went through Bethany Christian Services. Our children's birthmoms are allowed a lifetime of free counseling. I think that is a great gift for someone who has given us the greatest gift!

Finances -- I have a friend who calls her two kids her Visa Babies! (smile) She decided that she wasn't going to let money be what kept her from motherhood. Here is my story -- my dh and I were approved and told that the average wait was 1-2 years for a newborn. We thought we had plenty of time to save some money. Wonderfully, we were called a couple months later. A birthmom had picked us from the parent book (a book of letters and pictures); she had a baby a couple days beforehand; and we could pick up our New Son that night! Wonderful, but Ahhhh, where do we get the money for the rest of the adoption? The agency gave us a grace period, but we did not need much of one. We called our bank and got a personal loan almost immediately. Yes, that means we had an extra bill, but oh what a wonderful boy we have!! He is now 5 years old -- I love him so much! I am so glad we did not let money come between us and our son.

Cheers, Jenny

FamilyBound · 04-28-2003, 09:56 PM

Hey there!

My husband and I do quite a bit of prospective adoptive parent counseling and we get that question quite a bit. Though it may seem daunting, once you come up witha game plan, it really does make sense.

My first suggestion is to get (and don't laugh) the "Complete Idiot's Guide to Adoption". We started with that book when we started, and it really answered a lot of questions for us an dgot us started on the right track to research more.

You will have to determine if you want to go one of three ways:
~ domestic agency/attorney (private, probably gte a newborn or very young infant)
~ foster-adopt (could take longer, depending on yoru state, may not be able to get a newborn or infant through an older child)
~ international adoption (private, bring home a young infant through older child)

Foster-adopt would probably be the least expensive route, but here in California, it definitely takes the longest and we just weren't patient people.

We did our first adoption from Russia, and had a wonderful experience. We are doing our second adoption through a domestic private agency only because we don't feel comfortable flying to Russia and leaving our son at home during these times.

websissy · 04-29-2003, 03:59 PM

We started out by going to a seminar put on by an international adoption agency. They went over the pros/cons, costs and international vs domestic, etc. They also went over the costs.

I know you can use a home equity loan to finance adoption and I believe there are lenders who specialize in low cost loans for adoptions.

The agency we are using for our Panama adoption plans is Commonwealth Adoptions - there website is http://www.commonwealthadoption.org

Best Wishes that your dreams will come true!

Krisyn · 04-29-2003, 10:24 PM

Ladies...thank you for your replies.
I will check some of these things out.
Best of luck to you

Krisyn