Questions to you ladies..

aprilwashere256 · 01-13-2009, 06:57 PM

Have any of you had to go on a medication to sleep?
How have you ladies managed to get through normal errands? Has anyone had to change their daily routines?
What have you found that has helped you the most?

I had to sit in the waiting room at the doctors office today among all the new moms and pregnant ladies. Once we got to our room my husband and I both started crying. I cried so hard I had an asthma attack. We told the doctor it was like psychological warfare. The doc has now arranged it so we can avoid sitting out there next time.

Emaline · 01-13-2009, 09:33 PM

I'm so sorry about your loss. I actually started crying when I read that you were crying - what an insensitive thing to do!

With my m/c I didn't take any medications, but it probably wouldn't have been a bad idea, considering how horrible that I felt. Perhaps you can ask your doctor for some drugs? What helped me the most was to dedicate something special in memory of my little guy.

I hope you can find some peace in such a difficult time.

constant_vigilance! · 01-13-2009, 10:40 PM

I always have Xanax on hand if I need it, so yeah, I definitely took advantage of it for a few weeks after my miscarriage. And yes, I managed to live life again without crying everyday, but it took a little while. It's gotten much easier but I definitely still have moments of sadness. I just want to forget that whole two months after we got our positive. Much too painful.

aprilwashere256 · 01-13-2009, 11:35 PM

The doc gave me xanax to help me sleep. Anxiety is keeping me up and I'm having fitful sleep. It is still just overwhelming. I feel bad for my husband, he has to work with the public and is around children a lot. He's trying to get another position where he'd be away from people more.

We found out on Dec 31st we were pregnant, and we lost the baby on Jan 8th. We barely had time to get adjusted to the idea before it was over.

Policewife · 01-13-2009, 11:43 PM

Hi there. I swore I wouldn't be back on the pregnancy loss board because I've moved past my M/C but I read your post and just wanted to say I'm so sorry.. I know it seems impossible now but it gets much much easier and you stop obsessing (if thats even the right word) about the miscarriage and start thinking more to the future of trying for another ( if that is your plans) . I'm to a point now where pregnant woman don't phase me cause I know that one day that'll be me and I get exicited instead of depressed..

I had a D & C because I was hemmoraging and I was so tramazied I woke yelling "you took my baby from me give it back" two nurses had to calm me down.... The procedure wasn't tramatizing it was what they had to do that was. Make sense... I never ever thought I could move past it.

I had to wait over an hour in the waiting room with tons of pregnant woman the day I went in to see if my baby had a heartbeat anymore. I'll never forget that day, it was my wedding anniversary. The baby didn't have a heart beat and waiting in there was like torture.. I had my baby for 9 weeks and you get used to seeing that heart beat for that long and then have it ripped away and see nothing is like having your heart ripped out of your chest....

Hang in there it will get easier I swear.. I never ever thought I'd be to a point where I'm okay with what happen, I spent nights crying and my husband would just say it is was it is so I had no support and it never even affected him so I dealt with it alone at home.. Good luck with everything! Time heals!

PCOSDC · 01-14-2009, 10:44 AM

I can relate. With this latest loss (at 14 weeks) We had to go to the maternity centre (to see my doc) the day after we found out the heartbeat had stopped. He had warned us and told us if we couldn't handle it then we could skip it but I had questions. The room was full of pregnant women and many of them we very young, unmarried, financially unstable, on drugs (it's a centre that provides free care to women at risk for unhealthy living). DH and I actually laughed when we got called back because it just seemed so crazy that all these people can have babies no problem and we had just lost our 3rd. Of course I still cry everyday. As for your questions: I have never taken drugs to deal with any of my m/c but I think that if you need them then take them! Life goes on even while you mourn and greive. Eventually you start living again. In the beginning you're faking it, just walking around like a zombie but eventually you start feeling human again but you NEVER forget your loss and your pain EVER!

SheriKCMO · 01-19-2009, 01:00 AM

Time is our only friend during those early days. It really is hard. The hormonal changes make it even harder on us than the dads, plus our bond with our little beans (or bigger) is so powerful from the start... Please just be gentle with yourself and see how things are in a few more weeks. If you really can't sleep or get past the anxiety enough to function, keep in touch with your doctor. There have been moms who need some medical help or counseling to cope. I also recommend support groups in person if you can find one. (((Hugs))) and I'm very sorry about your loss!!

rxgirl091308 · 01-19-2009, 06:06 PM

I am so sorry for your loss. It is really difficult getting back into the flow of normal life after a miscarriage. I am slowly working my way back in after my miscarriage that happened 3 weeks ago (9 weeks along). At first I basically just moped around the house I didn't care what I looked like, what I ate, I didn't care about anything. I just felt so empty and like I was such a let down to my DH. College restarted last week and that forced me back into the world for a couple of hours, 3 days a week. It is slowly getting better, but I still prefer to be at home doing nothing. Probably if I was still working that would also give me a chance to reconnect to normal life but since I lost my job due to my miscarriage that is not a possibility (they expected me to work through it). I haven't taken any RX medications just some OTC's except for during the miscarriage itself. For sleeping I have been taking 6 mg of melatonin and some Tylenol, but it really hasn't helped. I think the only thing that helps is time to heal. I really hope you feel better soon. Take care.