Scared and sad and frustrated

cystsBgone · 04-16-2005, 07:40 PM

Can anyone help me please. I am really concerned and tears today b/c I haven't gotten a period yet, cramping and I feel like I'm taking too many meds. I stopped the Provera trial over a week ago-almost two weeks now. I am so pissed at docs right now. I see a psychiatrist, a PCP, and a therapist and the therapist is an addictions specialist, I couldn't 'do' therapy with my former psychiatrist b/c of the physical pain, and he thought the pain killer was the problem. I'm in a catch 22 and have been told this. I don't take more than 1 pain killer a day and now they think I'm an addict and dangit I'm not and I'm notin denial either. I feel kinda lime carey right now, this is really the only place i have to turn. I have a few friends, they all know Im going through this and my family has their own problems. I want to give up but iknow that's not the answer at all, and i won't go there. So I have three pain killers left, and not sure how they expect me to live and breathe with the cramps, and feeling so crappy.
What would you guys do? Do I need to draw a line here and if so, how? I'm not good at this kind of thing. I did call my therapist and told him I felt like I was being condemned b/c I have legitimate pelvic pain and he understood, but how does that look to the physician who prescribes me the pain killers that I'm seeing an addictions specialist/PsyD??? I called for a refill Thursday night, and she has not called in one. Life isn't fair, but I have to get my point across this is wrong!!!!!!

Hayles · 04-16-2005, 10:19 PM

I'm sorry youre going thru this right now I have no idea what to say so I'm just sending some ((((Hugs))))

joanne23 · 04-16-2005, 11:21 PM

((((((HUGS)))))) I certainly hope that you are feeling better soon. The only thing that I can think of to help you is that perhaps you can try seeing a different physician who can help you with your pain? Feel better and good luck!

Pattyannruss · 04-17-2005, 11:43 AM

I have had to use them off and on for 2 years now.

You have to be very honest with your dr and have a reason why you take them. You then tell them each refill time how you take them. For me, I only used them for work days. Many here know my story and the pain I have lived for 3 years now.
I have days I can barely walk after work.

My story is really long, so I will give you a list of things to try.
First of all pain pills can cause pain. This is how you can become addicted to them(even only taking 1 a day) When it wears off is when your pain gets worse and your body is telling you to take it again.

You need to determine the cause of the pain.(LAP)
Then you need to start a pain management program that will change from time to time.
If you take Tylanol and Ibuprofen in correct doses and the correct times you will have a better pain control.(Contact me for detail info)

Cronic pain doesn't go away. But you can have some control over it.
You must face it and work with your body for relief. But you can not live on the pain pills to control it. They won't! They should only be used during treatment when all other factors have been used correctly and safely.

Patty

cystsBgone · 04-18-2005, 12:18 AM

Thanks cysters. Patty, I'm so sorry you're in pain too, sometimes pain killers, the ones that physicians feel are always addictive to everyone, seem to be the only relief so we can work or go to school...I've been taking this pain killer since March 2004. I always have been very honest about how and when I take them, and she never had a problem prescribing them to me. However, since starting to see this PsyD last month, we both (my Psyd/Addictions specialist) agreed that I was going to wean myself off of the pain killer--thing is how does one wean off one pain killer a day?! Maybe I stuck my foot in my mouth. What can I say when I call tomorrow? I saw my PCP last week and I didn't even ask her for a refill, so when I called Thursday to ask, still no call to my pharmacy. I explined how I feel to my PsyD and to my PCP's RN, so it's been a waiting game all weekend.
I think the PT will help a lot. I started bleeding this morning after church after praying and meditating on healing scriptures for the last 24 hours. Now to see if I keep bleeding...
Thank you for your suggestions, I will keep them in mind

cystsBgone · 04-18-2005, 10:32 PM

Curiousme, no worries, I do understand where you're coming from, and last year at this time I was taking SIX pain killers a day, I was high!
You didn't sound heartless at all. In life there is pain, and some days we have to push thorugh it, many times it has halted my life, especially for the last year-and that's no fun for anyone. My doc called in an Rx for Norco, when her RN told me for Vicodin, so I had to call her back and told her I cannot take Norco, makes me nauseated-too strong, so still waiting for her to change it back to Vicodin.
For the back pain, the PT is helping, sore, but needing to change things like my posture, the way I bend, lift, stand, and drive, changes, small ones but definately needed.

Do you have pain frm any certain cndition? Or from the cramps basically? BTW, I am a WIMP when it comes to physical pain, b/c I lived up until oh about 30-pain free. Very fortunate, but repeated abuse I put on my body via dance and sports, thinking I would be feeling good 24/7/365 was fooling myself.
Ice packs and heat help too, and rest when I can, think it's like that for most of us w/pain here.

cystsBgone · 04-19-2005, 01:05 AM

You roll on-I like that! Do you just take like Tylenol and Advil for the pain or does it not get that bad enough that you can "roll" on? I worked in a service deli for 5 years, rosk of cutting fingers of in that slicer, not sure if that's what you're talking about? Those machines are dangerous!
Pain tolerance was the word I was looking for, yep low...
I'm screwed tonight, if I lie on my back, AF will drain the wrong way if you know what I mean, sorry if TMI--but true nonetheless. If I lie on my side, no heat or ice on my back, screwed! LOL

LOL yes, pain free-physically anyway-for about 30 years, just never started feeling sick until I was about 30, sick to the point my life stopped. The increased weight, absent periods, anxiety, family stuff, need I go on? no I dont think so lol among other things caught up with me I guess. I just don't remember feeiling so sick since the last couple of years physically, but my emotions have played a part no doubt among other things again

Last March is when it really got worse, between moving, lifting, I lost about 30 pounds, inside before the last surgery I was a mess, it moved to my back last Oct. Don't know where or how it went wrong, and the continued smoking of cigarettes is not helping either, so I just roll along changing one thing at a time to improve my health. Before I write a frikken book about myself, I'll stop now

acrowe · 04-19-2005, 10:42 AM

I think THE best pain reliever is Aleve if you can't get your Hydrocodone...or whatever youre on. My mother has to take pain medication for her back. But she never takes more than prescribed. Her doc always gives it to her because she knows exactly what to say. She also doesnt use it if she is feeling okay.

I dont think anyone should have to live with pain especially since there are so many options out there. Just make sure you are only taking the meds when you absolutely have to, because those things have nasty side effects (not to mention addiction). I think like someone else said, just make it very clear to your doc how much pain you are in. You can say...will you help me or do I have to go to a pain management clinic and spend more money? I am in serious pain here and if you don't understand, may I be referred to another doctor?

Good Luck!

cystsBgone · 04-20-2005, 12:21 AM

Bleh! I blew it today but since the surgery I am flowing like a river and the cramps were just unable to tolerate today so i took two Vicodin and I was ill most of the day. I know that stuff is wicked crap, and I am going to try to take the Aleve tomorrow. I do not like the narcotics either, besides addiction, they are just strong stuff, so I put a heating pad on my gut and an ice pack on my back, and pray, then go to sleep LOL Thanks for the suggestions about the doubling the pads, I had to get those overnighters today! LOL (my what lurkers have to laugh about) Curiousme, we'll have to talk about the meat slicer stuff, I am so sorry you had all that happen, what an experience!! OUCH! I registered for summer school, just 3 units, so I'll only have 4 courses to go til I walk in May if all goes well. *praying about that* Good luck on your essay, hope you finished it. And yes, cigarettes are nasty, like I've been saying and Ill keep saying it so I remind myself, baby steps for this cyster, can't change all things at once..to sum it up, I know when I wrote this post, my period was going to come sooner or later, and it did. Had no idea how much emotions really are affected, and PMS don't help cystas!

acrowe, get this, if I was truly an addict, I would have taken that Norco they called in and ran with it, that stuff is very strong, come to find out this morning that the Rn did call in Vicodin, my pharmacy messed up, then they messed up again, when the pharmacist said, K can't put in Rx's into the computer, so I was told, "they still have an Rx for Norco", I said, "I can't take Norco!, so didn't this girl tell a pharmacist about the called in Rx?"....duh, uh no, but it will get all straightened out. After today, I can only take one a day of the stuff or else I get nauseated anyway and feel ****tier. *covers mouth*
The cramps will pass

Not the end of the world lol

cystsBgone · 04-20-2005, 06:51 PM

ack let's stop talking about the meat slicer thing

I noticed yesterday that the opiate makes me mean! Irritable and grumpy. Af just makes me sore, especially this first one since the surgery. I hate it when you get up and you feel like you're giving birth-come to find out it's a bunch of clots! *shiver*
Annyyyyhoo, lol, Re: the weight loss issues, ya know, I don't have much of an appetite, and NO dinero to join any kind of program, and I'm finding that if I just think before I put anything in my mouth, I am doing pretty good. I have been eating asparagus off trees, summer squash, tons of water, tuna, halibut, salmon, bananas, and bought some of Pamela's wheat/gluten free choco chunk cookies, they were good! I would like to try Nutri System again, I didn't know they still existed, out here in the West I haven't seen any. If I had the money, I could 'do' a program, but I think I'm doing ok, I seem to stress myself out more when I have to follow a program. I have learned a lot about nutrition so I'll just keep doing what I'm doing, see if the weight comes off. I take a weight inducing med, so that is against me, unfortunately, weighed myself last night, 215 from 218 about two weeks ago, not bad

"I'm trying not to stress about anything I figure that I've stressed enough over the past couple months so I'll just deal with it now"

AMEN cysta

Have a good one

Niteowl · 04-20-2005, 08:03 PM

I am new at posting so I hope I am doing this correctly.

Anyhow, I was diagnosed almost ten yrs ago. I am 23 and have suffered symptoms of PCOS since the onset of puberty. (about 8 yrs old) Throughout my teen years, I had alot of physical and emotional pain. Real pain. Feeling like my insides were falling out and wanting to die because I was so depressed. I turned to alcohol and pain killers. I kicked the alcohol habit when I was 18 because I had ulcers and because being an alcoholic isn't good either. But the pills, I continued to use. When you are hurting so much in the body and the mind, it is hard to know when you are treating and when you are abusing. Wanting to escape the pain is not a crime, and addiction to meds like Vicodin can come without warning or intention. Sometimes docs can prescribe non-narcotic meds that are effective. I have taken Xanax before and all I can do is sleep on it. But meds like hydrocodone (a class one narcotic- NOT gentle stuff) and Vic are wicked drugs in the way that they are very addictive. But, they are effective, as you know. The best suggestions I can make, besides talking to your doctor with full honesty about your pain and what you desire from treatment, is to implement the stronger drugs only when you absolutely need them. Use advil as a management, and take the lowest dose possible of a narcotic when the pain is too great to deal with. The goal of a pain killer is to kill the pain, not get you high, so if you are feeling high but the pain is gone, try reducing the dose until it helps the pain but doesn't make you feel like a zombie. Also, I will say that I have kicked the use of pain killers almost entirely by turning to alternative medicine. The use of natural remedies, diet changes, and HERBS, can really help to alleviate pain. I promise. Also, as another gal mentioned... heat. Having a heating pad on your back or abdomen can help. Hot tea. Hot shower. Give this stuff a try. I know that crawling out from under the protective fuzzy cloud of narcotics is very difficult. We're all here for ya.

cystsBgone · 04-22-2005, 08:25 PM

sorry to gross ya out curiousme lol Hi noghtowl, thanks for jumping in

Your posts numbed me, it was good, what HERBS do you use? Alcohol and street drugs for me aren't a problem, never have been thank God!!
I think my environment is toxic and my therapist wants me to go to a 'house' I guess youd call it, where they have meetings for te use and possibler addiction of narcotics, but these women have drug and alcohil problems too. It's a bit of money a month, but doable, so i really need to think about it, especially since my brother just shouted so the whole eighborhood heard, I am so frikken scared and sick odf his behavkor i cannot tolerate much more.
Sorry my typing is off, shaky. Gotta calm down. Vicodin is nasty and Im doing the best i can and only taking it when absoljtely nexceassary, so I'm ok so far I guess. I'm really confused at the same time

Thank you so much for the suggestions, I appreciate it so much. What natural remedies, diet changes, and HERBS, have heloed you?

I need you all so much right now, I'm going to take a hot shower and use the heating pad, I already took one Vicodin today.

(((hugs)))