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Old 05-03-2008, 03:02 AM   #1516 (permalink)
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Today was ok, except for the headache I had all day. I talked to a woman about infertility, she told me about her 2 daughters with severe endrometrosis

I was sad talking about it...I hope this month is my month!
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Chrystal (28) ~ DF (33)
Hypothyroid (125mcg Levoxyl), PCOS w/ IR, (1000mg Met), Anemia, Asthma

* 4/30/08 - P4 Results, CD21 (0.6) = No O
* 5/16/08 - Round 1 Clomid (50mg), CD 3-7
* 6/05/08 - P4 Results, CD23 (5.9) = O, BFN
* 6/18/08 - Round 2 Clomid (50mg), CD 5-9
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Old 05-03-2008, 12:34 PM   #1517 (permalink)
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feeling preety good so far - justwaxed my face and plucked the brows ,i m on spiro now for a month n kinda notice my hairs are thinner .i slept great last night - the only major issue is my vag is completly N I MEAN COMPLETLY DRY and for the past three days i had a watery liquid n now nothin
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Old 05-06-2008, 03:05 PM   #1518 (permalink)
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Unhappy So so down...

Today was hot and so I feel ten times worse about myself. Women in vests and shorts looking lovely and me pasty, in flat sandals and loose shirt trying not to sweat. Everytime sunlights gets on my face I worry as I know it is highlighting my stubble, no matter how much make-up I use it is impossible to cover.

I hate thinking about it but I wish I were dead, I hate trying to live my life with absolutely no confidence. I am waiting to see if I can have gastric band surgery which scares the hell outta me and I know some people die. As I am my life is not worth living so I should just go for it. I cannot imagine being a normal size and not spending half an hour shaving and plucking every morning before putting on my cosmetics. It seems to out of reach. I sometimes think I was bad in a past life and deserve this torture. What if the surgery is OK but I cannot living off a few mouthfuls of food. I just want to hide under my duvet but have to pack for a business trip where I have to look smart and face people ugh!
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My best wishes to all sufferers, may you find the inner strength & support you need - you are not alone!

PCOS: Dxd Jan'06 but suffering since '86 - Hirsutism, Facial Sweating, Headaches, mild HS, IBS-D, PMS & Depression
Meds: Vaniqa/250mg Flutamide
Waiting for a referral for bariatric surgery! A solution at last?
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Old 05-06-2008, 03:24 PM   #1519 (permalink)
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I keep hopeing that the next test is our lucky miracle... our life is finally starting to come back together now but it feels like I'm on that rollercoaster again; this is a place that I seem to be finding myself a lot lately. And finding out that I've not much chance left ... makes it all that much harder. He tells me he's trying to understand and it isn't that it doesn't hurt him it is just that he deals with it differently. He doesn't get his hopes up like I do I guess. It is soo hard to get out of bed some days and others when I do get out of bed I just sit around. I am starting a new job and I have a hundered billion things to get done before I don't have the time... but I just can't bring myself to do it anymore.

Tomorrow is another day...
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my "kids" 1 cat Oliver; 1 kitten Jr ; 1 retriever Lucky; and 1 Goldendoodle Fozzie

The emotional rollercoaster...
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Starting foster care classes 7/08

Dx: PCOS March 13, 2000
Other Dx: PTSD, Depression/Anxiety, Fibro, Sleep Apnea, High BP
Rx: Prozac 40mg daily, Metformin 500mgER 1x daily,
Weight on 5/13/08 317...goal 185

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Old 05-07-2008, 12:05 PM   #1520 (permalink)
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Morning Ladies! Is it too late for me to join?? Hope everybody's having a great day!
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Diagnosed in 2002.
Current Meds-Yaz!

Music=Therapy!
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Old 05-10-2008, 01:30 PM   #1521 (permalink)
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Today seems like to be it will be another crappy day. I've lost a lot of weight recently and have been living on cloud 9 (given that I ignore my hairiness) Summer is around the corner and I just don't want it to come. I feel horrible thinking about how it is the best time of the year for the rest of world and it's the worst for me.
It just seems like everything is falling apart for me...
I normally don't care too much about how I look, but now that I work I have to keep up appearances. ugh....
I really like this guy ( i know he likes me too) and PCOS makes me feel like no matter what things can never work out between us. I think about him 24/7. I'm completely losing my mind... I know he likes me just as much but little does he know about my PCOS and I don't know how it would impact him...
Let alone everything else that has happened that could impact a relationship if we ever have one.

I just feel so miserable. I feel like I have no control over my life whatsoever. No matter what I do to make things right, they always manage to fall apart. I don't what I ever did to deserve a life like the one I'm living. I just wish I could be normal like other girls.

I remember when I was I in high school I would wake up every morning thinking I was living a nightmare. (I spent 4 years of my life like that, I didn't know I had PCOS and I was constantly teased and made fun of at school). I feel just like that today.
I have no clue what the future holds and it seems there's nothing I can do to make it better.

My life is pretty difficult as it is and then PCOS comes along to multiply my difficulties by infinity.
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Old 05-12-2008, 04:38 PM   #1522 (permalink)
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I'm feeling pretty depressed today.. had a long weekend.. I just finished writing down a bunch of names of doctors in my area. Hopefully I'll get around to scheduling some kind of appointment soon. I feel so fat today.. None of my clothes fit me anymore.. I woke up this morning with a horrible head ache.. and fever. I didn't think I was going to make it to work. I'm so tired.

Our family went out to dinner last night to celebrate Mothers day and my Dad's Birthday at a Chinese restaurant. It was pretty fun, my parents had a great time. My fortune cookie said " Your most memorable dream will come true" and my husbands said "A small lucky package is on its way to you soon"

I'm hoping its a baby!
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Old 05-14-2008, 12:14 AM   #1523 (permalink)
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Wonderful idea!
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Old 05-14-2008, 12:15 AM   #1524 (permalink)
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Is anyone allowed to join? I would love a place to download my thoughts...
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