Sensitive issue... future death of baby. - Page 3

stapes · 05-11-2008, 02:07 AM

Amy ~ Isn't it amazing how a little baby can bring a grown man into a relationship with God!!?? Thank you so much for sharing that with me.

AmyLynn156 · 05-11-2008, 12:55 PM

You are welcome! I just want you to know that what you are going through is not for nothing!!! All things come together for good...even though they really stink at the moment (and for a very long time)!!!

fay22 · 05-11-2008, 01:39 PM

I'm so sorry you are going through this difficult situation. Words cannot express how much I admire your strength and faith in God.
Best wishes to all the ladies who have posted with similar problems. You are all so brave.
God Bless you and your family and your little baby boy. Always remember that miracles do happen and never lose hope.

You are in my prayers,
Fay

biogal · 05-12-2008, 03:29 AM

Stapes, your strength is an inspiration! You are already such an amazing, loving mommy! After the recent death of my son, Myles, I read a book entitled "Waiting with Gabriel" that you might want to read. It's the story of a couple who's baby was diagnosed with a rare fatal heart defect. They chose to carry the baby to term knowing that he would die. Their story was an example of the most courageous and loving act any parent can do. Your unconditional love for your son is so obvious.

My son Myles was born at 26wks due to severe preeclampsia and IUGR. Although he was genetically perfect, he was extremly tiny (13oz) due to the intrauterine growth restriction caused by the preeclampsia. He was not expected to survive past the first day of his life, but we stood by his side and cheered him on. We were fortunate that our little man was a fighter and we got to spend 26 days with our son. These 26 days were the best and worst days of our lives .... even if we knew the outcome we would not go back and change a thing. We feel fortunate to have had Myles in our lives for any amount of time ... when he was born our life felt complete! Even if you only get to spend a few minutes or hours with your son he will forever change you! Trust me even a minute with your baby will be worth any amount of heartache you will go through! If you would like to see Myles' journey, you can view his video montage:

http://www.onetruemedia.com/otm_site...category_id=26

I am sending you much strength in this most difficult journey!

Hugs,
Niki

Joyfulwife · 05-12-2008, 01:06 PM

I am crying with you and praying for you.

My son, Ephraim, died and was born on March 1st of this year. He had a stricture on his cord caused by amniotic band syndrome. Otherwise, he tested "normal".

When we suspected his heart had stopped, before we had confirmation, I asked the Lord if He would - please not have me drink this cup. BUT if this is the cup He has for me - I will drink it gladly.

The Lord has MANY joys for you and even joy in this suffering.

In Psalm 13 David is in agony and anguish and is crying out to the Lord - asking why He has forgotten him. At the end of the Psalm still in the SAME circumstances he was in at the beginning - David concedes that, "the Lord has dealt bountifully with me."

I am praying for you, Nathan and your husband.

In Him,
Victoria

Psalm 13
Prayer for Help in Trouble.
For the choir director. A Psalm of David.
1How long, O LORD? Will You forget me forever?
How long will You hide Your face from me?
2How long shall I take counsel in my soul,
Having sorrow in my heart all the day?
How long will my enemy be exalted over me?
3Consider and answer me, O LORD my God;
Enlighten my eyes, or I will sleep the sleep of
death,
4And my enemy will ay, "I have overcome him,"
And my adversaries will rejoice when I am shaken.
5But I have trusted in Your lovingkindness;
My heart shall rejoice in Your salvation.
6I will sing to the LORD,
Because He has dealt bountifully with me.

stapes · 05-12-2008, 09:02 PM

Niki ~ I watched the journey of your sweet baby, Myles and just wanted to let you know how much it touched my heart. He was obviously loved by many and left an impression on this world, even in 26 days. Thank you for sharing.

Fay ~ Thank you so much for your prayers, for I don't know where I would be without them.

Victoria ~ I love that Psalm. It seems to say just the right things. Thank you for reminding me about it.

As for me... yesterday at church, a man sang a song that I have on my blog... a song that has really described my situation. It is called Bring the Rain by Mercy Me. It is fitting that he sang it on my first mother's day. I wept through the whole song.

I don't know anything new as far as the baby goes. At work today, my co-workers were saying that they thought that I grew over the weekend. I "look" pregnant now... there is no hiding it! It is bitter sweet.

I go to the doctor again in 3 weeks. I am having a sonogram to look at the hernia to see if it is growing on the inside or the outside of his tummy... just to know what to expect to see when he is born. I'm also doing the glucose test. Last time I saw him on the sonogram, it made me very sad. He looks less and less "healthy" every time. I almost just want to remember the baby that I saw with no problems. Don't get me wrong... I still love him despite it all, it just looks so "wrong" and painful. It is hard for me because there is nothing that I can do to "fix" it.

Anyway, thanks again for all of your sweet words. I will continue to update as I know things and I write on my blog various thoughts almost daily.

lovepotato · 05-13-2008, 02:51 AM

You are such an amazing mommy! I've been reading this thread and your blog for a couple days, and I'm just now able to post. We lost our first baby 2 1/2 years ago to either Amniotic Band Syndrome or Limb Body Wall Complex. For 28 weeks, we didn't know anything was wrong, but I knew in my heart we weren't going to get to take our baby home. At 29 weeks, I started leaking fluid, so I was sent to the hospital to hopefully stop labor, and if not, we'd be spending a long time in the NICU.

In a span of about 15 hours, we were told our sweet baby had birth defects "incompatible with life," I went into labor, and our baby was born still. When they told us our baby wouldn't make it, I looked at my husband and said "see!! I told you there was something wrong!!" But throughout that whole 15 hours and the months that followed, I felt this amazing peace, and I could feel God with me. It was just amazing, I can't even describe it.

Our sweet baby boy did have birth defects. We were told he might have a cleft lip/palate, club feet, his head was open, and so was his chest. They didn't know exactly what he would look like. He did have an open chest and head, but he was the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. He looked exactly like his daddy with my hands and ears. I have this one picture of him and me, and he looks so happy. Like nothing could possibly be wrong because his mommy had him. He even looked like he had his arm around me. I was afraid to see him too, but his pictures are my most prized possession. And his dad said that his heart was too big for his chest to hold. His picture is my avatar.

Before I had Eric, I believed in the Lord, but I didn't really know Him the way I do now. His birth lead me to the church I go to now, and I've learned so much. I go to a mommy group that welcomed me even though so people wouldn't have called me a mommy, and I've been working on bereavement boxes for other couples who have lost a baby too. I was too afraid to drive before I had him, now I'm not. I still have a ways to go, but I've actually felt God because of Eric. He was an awesome gift, even if I didn't get to keep him as long as I wanted. My life is so much better since I had him.

You are so beautiful in your blog pictures. I can relate to so many things you say in it too. Its like I could have written it 2 1/2 years ago. I'm praying for your family.

MelonBerry · 05-14-2008, 12:30 AM

God bless you Stapes. Continue to remain steadfast. Your faith is a testimony to the greatness of our Savior. Your faith and testimony is a witness to all. May Jesus draw you near now and always!

Romans 1:8 "First, I thank my God through Jesus Christ for all of you, because your faith is being reported all over the world."

pookietooth · 05-15-2008, 05:05 AM

(((hugs)))) to you mama.

stapes · 05-17-2008, 12:29 PM

I just want to jump on real quick and say thank you so much for the support that you ladies show me. I am blessed by it.

I will update as we know things. Right now, we are just waiting for our next doctors appointment and sonogram that will come in the first week of June. We are just "waiting."

uwalcott · 05-18-2008, 12:44 PM

I just wanted to visit this thread and tell you I am thinking about you and your Nathan. Be strong in the Lord and remember His love.

stapes · 05-25-2008, 09:27 PM

Just checking in to let you know that we will have a sonogram in a little over a week. I am anxious to see what we are up against as far as his hernia is concerned. Thank you again for your prayers, thoughts, and support as we face the birth and possible death of our baby.

biogal · 05-26-2008, 03:19 AM

((((HUGS)))))

I'll be thinking of you and your precious little Nathan! Thank you for your kinds words about Myles.

justagirlgirlgirl · 05-26-2008, 12:33 PM

We will be thinking of you. Please keep us updated.

JessieW · 05-28-2008, 03:06 PM

Stapes,
I have not been through this, but my friend Angie did just recently. Have you read her blog, Bring the Rain? Her husband is a Christian singer and so it has pretty widespread popularity. She is a wonderful writer. The address is: audreycaroline.blogspot.com.

I am praying for you and your son.

Jessie