I thought I would post this in case there were any of you in the Minneapolis/St. Paul, MN area that have lost a child. I can't imagine how hard every day must be without your children but the holidays must be exceptionally hard on you. All of you are in my thoughts and prayers this holiday season and throughout the year. I hope you can find some peace and healing. If you are in the area, please consider going to one of these services....you and your children are not forgotten! Take care and God blees you!
Amid holidays, a chance to grieve
Services let families mark loss of a child
BY EMILY GURNON
Pioneer Press
The baby in the manger. The stockings on the fireplace. The magic of Christmas morning with gifts under the tree. What would Christmas be without children?
That question becomes painfully relevant for those who have lost a child.
Services planned at two Twin Cities churches Sunday aim to give a measure of solace and peace to people struggling with such a loss.
A candle-lighting ceremony will be at 6:30 p.m. at Beaver Lake Lutheran Church in Maplewood in conjunction with the Worldwide Candle Lighting organized by the Compassionate Friends, a group of parents who have suffered the loss of a son or daughter.
"This is such a hard time of the year for those of us who have lost anyone, much less a child," said Cathy Seehuetter, of Cottage Grove, co-leader of the St. Paul chapter of Compassionate Friends. "If you don't have a place to go with that grief, it'll get you."
The nondenominational ceremony gives parents, grandparents and siblings a chance to remember the child whose absence is so sharply felt. The service features live harp music, readings and time for each person to come forward to light a candle in their child's name.
"Pretty soon the room just gets brighter and brighter," Seehuetter said.
Seehuetter's daughter, Nina, was 15 when a drunken driver killed her in Florida in 1995. It was Cathy Seehuetter's birthday.
Lydia Huttar Brown also counts herself a member of the "club that nobody wants to belong to."
The Episcopal priest from North Oaks will speak at a service for deceased children at 5 p.m. Sunday at St. John the Baptist Episcopal Church in Minneapolis.
Brown lost her son Stephen 21 years ago. The boy, who was not quite 2, drowned in a goldfish pond at her parents' house, she said.
"I know how very painful that is, and I know how the holidays, especially in the early years, can be very, very hard," she said.
The service, which also features a lighting of candles, offers those who are grieving "an acknowledgment from the church and from the world that this is a difficult time, that they have lost something precious, and that it's all right to grieve," she said.
There's also some comfort in knowing that one is part of a community, Brown said.
"You know you're not alone, that God didn't single you out for this tragedy," she said.
The Rev. Devon Anderson, who has organized the service at St. John the Baptist for the past two years, said she hopes it will attract people who have lost young children, adult children or those who died as a result of miscarriage or abortion.
There will be no collection taken and no Holy Communion, and people can easily skip the reception after the service if they wish.
"Primarily, it's just a place for people to bring that part of themselves that is suffering," Anderson said, "a resting place for people who are carrying that really heavy load."
Emily Gurnon can be reached at
egurnon@pioneerpress.com or 612-338-6516.
Services for children who have died
Beaver Lake Lutheran Church
2280 Stillwater Ave., Maplewood
651-459-9341
6:30 p.m. Sunday
St. John the Baptist Episcopal Church
4201 Sheridan Ave. S., Minneapolis
612-922-0396
5 p.m. Sunday
Services in the Minneapolis/St. Paul, MN area Sunday to honor your children 
