My dad died

[ely]

Hey girls,

I've just found out from a member of my family that my dad died from a stroke last week. The funeral is taking place tomorrow in sussex, so I won't be able to get home in time for it. Not that my step-mum or any of her family would want me there.

But whats most upsetting is that my dads last wish was to see his six children all together just once in his lifetime, he got to see the other five together, but i was robbed of my chance to say my final goodbye and also tell him that i had forgiven him for everything he had put me through.

Elly

[Allison.]

I'm so sorry for your loss.

[Sari]

I'm so sorry to hear about your dad passing. I hope all 6 of you will be able to get together for his funeral, and I believe that he will be able to know that you forgave him. It might also help you to pray that he understands what you wanted to him to know.

[wombat woman]

I'm really sorry for your loss and that yours and your Dad's wishes were not fulfilled before he died.

It's not too late, even though he is gone, to tell him IMO. Tell him everything or even write it in a letter and if you want, burn it or bury it or something. I think he knew anyway, but I think you need to say it for your own peace of mind.

I really hope it isn't the case that you didn't get your chance to make peace with your Dad because the family didn't tell you sooner. If that is the case than that must be one of the cruellest things anyone could do to another person. The fact that you were told so long after the fact, with no time to make arrangements to attend the funeral is just awful if that was done so that you cannot attend than these people are trully heartless.

I hope one day you can look back with peace, and I hope these people regret what they have done. HUGS

Karen

[Eva37]

I am so sorry
Eva

[Deeds2]

I'm sorry for your loss

[ely]

Hi girls,
Thanks for all your messages of support.

Karen- my step mum and her family forbid any of my sisters till ten o'clock last night. So untill they knew that it was too late for me to get home...
Plus the fact that she is the one who wouldn't let the hospital contact me in order for me to be able to see him one last time.

Elly

[TracyW2]

{{{HUGS}}}

NO words can express the sadness you are going through. Your stepmom should have realized its not about her during this time. Some people just cant put themselves aside and see the big picture.

Again a big {{{HUG}}} to you.

~tracy

[rallygirl1812]

Dear Elly

I know exactly what you are going through. I lost my grandfather last July and was only told about his death in October. My mum only found out because she received a letter from his solictior regarding his will. In my anger and hurt I wrote to his new wife asking for an explaination. However, over the past few months I have tried to make peace with myself about this and am gradually forgiving his new wife for not telling us.

Unfortunately I lost my step mum, who I was very close to, last Friday. Luckily I was about to catch a flight to London from Scotland in time to say my goodbyes. I am travelling down tomorrow for her funeral.

I truely am feeling for you and understand all the emotions you are going through.

Rallygirl1812

[paddy]

I'm so sorry for your loss... Your Dad will know how you feel, he'll know you wanted to be there. Write your goodbye, tell him everything you want to say in a letter. He will know...

Paddy

[briggy]

I really feel for you, but as others have said don't think you have missed your chance, i'm completly agree with the letter writing it will make you feel much better.

If you get a chance sometime go to his grave and have a chat

Sending you lots of

[ely]

Hey girls,
I am defenitly going to put everything down in a letter.
Briggy- you said if i got the chance to go to his grave and have a chat unfortunately that will not be possible because of the fact that hes being cremated and my step-mum is keeping the ashes at their house, so leaving all of us without anywhere to go and sit and talk to him.

I just can't see things getting any better in my life at all.
Elly

[nourania]

Elly,
I wish I could hug you..there is nothing worse than leaving things unsaid and not getting closure...I wish I could help...writing it down does sound like a good idea...
all the best,
Rani

[AmyNicole78]

Oh Elly I feel your pain. I am so sorry to hear that he passed away. I just lost my year old godson on Friday. His funeral is going on right now. I couldn't get off of work to go. I am so upset that I can't make it. Anyway, I just wanted to tell you that we are here for cysta!

[cazza77]

really sorry