First loss

[HannahE]

I've only browsed here before, but I think you guys might be able to help me. . .
I recently got married (5/27/06) and by some miracle got pregnant on my honeymoon (after being on BCP and metformin for YEARS).
I had an U/S at 6 weeks that showed a heart beat but on Monday (after spotting all weekend) my doctor couldn't get a heartbeat and an U/S also showed no heartbeat. The next day I had a d&c.
Even though it's only been a few days, I'm trying to pick myself up, dust myself off and move on. I was wondering whether anyone knows how early we can try again, and any tips on preventing another loss.
Thanks for listening!
Hannah

[*SAHMommie*]

I am so sorry for your loss. My thoughts are with you & your DH.

As far as TTC again...ever dr gives different advice.
My dr wanted me to have one cycle before TTC.

Tips on preventing another loss....I wish I knew the answer to that.

Again, sorry for your loss (hugs).

I have found wonderful support & understanding from the ladies here.

[HopefulCyster]

Sorry for your loss sweetie ***HUGS***

I jumped right back into it after my loss, but it was very hard on me emotional. (still is) This first month after, when I jumped right back into it, I had to wait a whole month for my period to return, then I didn't ovulate at all on that cycle. So, you will have to give your body time to adjust.

Also, take care of yourself mentally/emotionaly... this is a very hard thing to go through. I wish you and your DH the best!

[HannahE]

Thanks for the responses - it's nice to know others who've been through the same (and even more)
Hannah

[HOLLAND]

I'm so sorry this has happened to you and you're DH!!!

[kdmichelle]

Hi there,
I m/c'd on Friday. The dr. said to wait at least one cycle before trying again. He said it is tough on the body to get pg again so soon after m/c.
Take care of yourself. I know how tough this is.

Michelle

[nicole47]

I am so sorry for your loss. DO allow yourself time to grieve... you may still need it.

Our doctor said to wait a month, mostly for emotional reasons and to make sure I had a thick endometrial lining built up for the next (clomid) cycle.

As for preventing further miscarriages... most miscarriages are unavoidable, caused by chromosome errors and things. For PCOS women, taking metformin during pregnancy helps, avoiding sugar and refined carbs during first trimester helps. Some doctors think that progesterone supplements during the first trimester help (some doctors don't and say it just delays the inevitable). If they do testing and can figure out why you miscarried and it is something like a blood clotting disorder, then they can give medications for that. But for the most part, there is nothing we can do.

[*Clarissa*]

I am sorry for you loss. While there is no way to prevent a m/c, I have to agree with a previous poster about taking and continuing met during your pregnancy, at least through the 1st trimester. I continued mine until the 18th week. Also having a P4 test is very important. With my son my P4 was only 8, so I took Prometrium to help sustain the pregnancy until the 2nd trimester when you don't need it anymore.

Big Hugs to you. I am sorry you are going through this. My first loss my baby's heart stopped like your's and I had to have the D&C. That was so hard, and I still think about it alot today. It was April 2004. I started trying again immediatly and was pg again in June, which I also m/c. After that I just decided to give my body a break for a few months. We started trying again after that in October.

It really depends on what you can handle. Do you want to try again soon? For me I felt I had too, I wanted it so bad, and I was hurting so much I just had to be pg again. Is your body and spirit up to it? If so I see no reason for you to wait. If you feel that you need some time to grieve, then maybe wait a cycle or two. Just make sure you are ready. It will be hard no matter how long you wait or do not wait, because you will always grieve your child that you lost. Basically there is no perfect amount of time for everyone to wait. It is when you are ready and you will know when you are. GL and hugs.

[HannahE]

kdmichelle - so sorry that you are going through this too. Sometimes I think I'm doing better and then something sets me off again.
I am going to work on being in the best health I can possibly be, taking my metformin, exercising, watching my diet.
I tried to go back to work today and just couldn't do it - one of my co-workers sent me home, so here I am.
Thanks to everyone for the support and good wishes. It helps to know that people care. All I really want to do is curl up on the sofa with DH and stay there for a few weeks. . .

[kdmichelle]

Hannah- I went to work yesterday. I was doing ok for a little while then...
I am a recruiter and one of the people I hired who was supposed to start soon called me to tell me that his wife lost a baby over the weekend and that he needed an extra week to start. I just lost it! Started crying.. told him I know how he feels and I am so sorry. Couldn't stop crying. One of my friends took me out to get an early lunch. I was ok for the rest of the afternoon but almost robotic-- emotionless. Then I came home and my husband took the ultrasound picture of the baby off the fridge. I started crying and wanted to know what he did with it. Poor guy.
I think I am going to stay home today... I just feel so drained.
Hannah-- I am thinking about you. Take care of yourself.

[HannahE]

kdmichelle - I'm so sorry, the worst thing is the unpredictability of what will upset me. Yesterday was pretty bad - I don't think DH knew what to do with me - but today is better. I came to work but mostly have just stayed out of people's way. The co-worker who sent me home told my boss and a few other people, which helps since they are all supportive.
Take care of yourself (and let other people take care of you too!)

[kdmichelle]

Thanks Hannah.. I appreciate it. Take care

[christinaray25]

Hi Hannah,

I'm sorry to hear about your lost. I miscarried june 3 and had a D & C and found out in August of this year that i was pregnant again. but I miscarried on sept 12 and it happend the same way. both showed the fetus to stop growing at 6 1/2 weeks. So i'm searching now to try and find out what is happening. but its safe to try after 6wks some doctors say wait 2 or 3 mos before trying again. but i think that is mainly for emotions.
good luck
Christina

[annem84]

(((HUGS))) Hannah

I can feel your pain. We lost Maya-Ruth on 9-10, born still. We are both still grieving and it will take time and we will always remember her, etc. Everybody grieves at different time intervals. Take ALL the time you need

[HannahE]

Thanks for all the prayers and support. Work has been crazy, so I haven't been around much. I'm doing a lot better but I still have my bad days when I get into bed and cry on my husband's shoulder. He told me yesterday that he is proud of how strong I've been, which kind of makes me laugh because I don't feel that strong.
I got my period this week - exactly 4 weeks from my D & C. Sort of bittersweet. A very real reminder that I'm no longer pregnant, as well as proof that my body knows how to do this (my periods were very irregular as a teenager - before I started the BCP)

Christina - it must have been hard to have 2 miscarriages in such a short amount of time - that takes a toll on your body and your emotions.

Anne - I'm so sorry about your recent loss. Take care of yourself!