Hello

[condor26]

My Wife has pcos she goes by lilbitmagoo and my dw is on here A LOT lol but I guess she is learning a lot....I am interested in knowing what the challenges are from the male perspective on my half of the equation...I have already experianced how emotional this whole issue can be but what are some other challenges

[The Man of the Board]

Welcome hope you stay here for the long battle you both are faced with you will need the support too my firend. Where to start ok you know about the moods right great one things we dont have to go over. Question how long have you both known she had PCOS. Remember one thing above all else it is not about you, meaning the moods or the swings, feeling inadequate, sex, depression, your depression if you dont talk to someone. Brings me to my other point no matter how strong you do talk to one another now more then ever you both need to talk out your feeling ( NOTE: this will be harder for her now mostly) One of the best things you can do it tell her how much you love her and need her every day, severval times a day. PCOS will take away the way she thinks about herself and will make her think you dont want to be around her any more. Another question: Is she on Met? I like to jump around when i am talking sorry its apart of a medical problem I had a few years back. Very important learn as much as you can from any book web site here other people as you can cause the better imformed you are the better you will be able to help your WL when she needs it. I am sure I will think of more later.

[nikbeehubby]

posting here is a good start.
lots to learn here. roam around the site and read read read.
the information on its own merits is valuable enough but better
still are the insights you will obtain by whats not said as much as
what is. be careful about what all you post about openly here. even tho this section is supposed to be for us guys more often than not threads here get hijacked by a few cysters that dont think 9999999 percent of the site is enough. (esp newer members that havent figured it out yet) you are welcome anytime to send me a PM with an email address and ill be happy to discuss anything you like off site.

PCOS is a pain for sure. each day is different and as ever some days are certainly better than others. be there, be supportive, shut-up and listen seems to work pretty well too. nikbee knows im quite cognizant of PCOS and what that entails- she knows too i cut her a lot of slack when it comes to being tempermental or moody but also knows i dont let her play it as a crutch to take advantage of.

TTC, a whole 'nother issue. we have been fighting this particular demon for a while now and have finally gotten to the point where we decided to just quit worrying about it. what will be will be. its gets old for sure. the doctors visits, the pills, stocking up on EPT tests, getting our hopes up only to be crushed yet again. the first miscarriage is the easiest- they only get harder from there.

the mood swings, what man hasnt been around a moody woman for at least a few days each month? with PCOS its moody all the time. you get used to it. i advise to never walk around on eggshells. if you are familiar with that expression.... you cant live your life in constant fear of pissing off your wife. be yourself. by that im not saying be a jerk... just dont go way out of your way to be perfect. that will just drive you crazy.

weight gain, hair, etc... i dont notice that stuff. nikbee is nikbee and thats all there is to it. she's my other half, my soulmate, my partner. all her hair could fall out and she grow a horn out of her forehead i wouldnt care. she is as always my sexy redhead trophy wife. the hormones? the only real issue here is what im assuming is elevated testosterone. ive never seen a woman with such a high sex drive. dont envy me LOLOLOL this is way beyond every high school boy's dream..... damn,,, i cant keep up. ive noticed a direct linear relationship to the intensity of the sex drive to the affects of the PCOS. i truly hate having to be the one to say "no" but sometimes i just cant keep up. put that in pill form and we would be instant millionaires.

beyond that i dont know what else to add. nikbee and i are partners in life. what affects her affects me. this is not her problem i have to contend with. its OUR problem we face together. we actively work on this and not a day goes by its not mentioned in one fashion or another. we discuss things, work things out, give and take. i do my best to take good care of her and never forget that she is dearly loved. she feels bad sometimes because she knows that the PCOS can be a drag but times like those i give an extra hug or two and a "its okay".

best of luck to you and yours.
PM me if you need to...
'bear

[condor26]

as far as how long we have known about the pcos....only since Jan or so we had known there were issues as she would have those (personal summers) and at 26 I knew that was not right....I would expect that of a woman my age (50) but not her age....we finally got some good health insurance so she could find out what was wrong.....and the mood swings........ooohhhh yeah...........from my sweet wonderfull dw lilbitmagoo to some she devel in .06 seconds........however like you I let it go to a point however I dont let her walk all over me either....we strike a good balance..........before the diagnoses she was all about.....I want to adopt I dont want to go through all of that........however now that she has been diagnosed of course she feels incomplete and wants a baby of her own more than ever............but I will walk this walk with her as long as I have breath in me no doubt about that.......all I can do is be as understanding as i can be and keep on loving her no matter what

[The Man of the Board]

Its a hard battle some times and then its smooth as silk. Your wife will love it more the more you understand about PCOS that is for sure. but if you need anything I am on the boards daily.