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Thread: Question about adoption

  1. #1
    Mason and Laken's mommy DaynaDayne is on a distinguished road DaynaDayne's Avatar
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    Default Question about adoption

    Hi my name is Dayna and I am new to this board. I have just been lurking. I have been looking at adoption since my IVF and my frozen cycle failed. I desperately would love to have more kids and adoption seems like another great option. My dh isn't quite sure he wants to do this but I have just been praying that God will have him come around or make the urge go away for me. I think he is opening up to the idea some what now. He is going to check into see if his employer offers any assistance. Mine does not. I feel like I have spent most of my money on fertility treatments and I am not sure if I am willing to invest anymore into a losing battle. My question is a odd one. Does your occupation matter when it comes to adoption? I have a f/t job working for an insurance company and my husband works p/t for a large express delivery company. But we have a side internet business of selling what I prefer to call relationship inhancing accessories. (ie sex toys) Would this hurt our chances of adoption? How would an agency view this? Any thoughts would be appreciated.
    Dayna 34, dh 36
    ds 7, dd 8/29/04, m/c 9/96
    2 dogs, 1 fish
    7 rounds of clomid with no luck
    1 IUI with clomid bfn!
    ovarian drilling 9/02
    2 more cycles with clomid bfn
    repronex 1/03 scrubbed 7 follies
    Gonal F 3/03 scrubbed 14 follies
    Gonal F 5/03 scrubbed 7 follies
    IVF cycle 9/03 failed! frozen cycle 11/03 3 embryos transfered-failed!
    12/03 Sticky blood pannel results postive
    moving on to adoption
    1/15/04 ++++pg test at dr. office surprise!!!!
    1/16/04 ob-gyn labled high risk due to blood disorder
    edd 9/16/04
    It's a girl: Laken Marie
    Lilypie Baby Days



  2. #2
    Blessed mama! Calantha is a splendid one to behold Calantha is a splendid one to behold Calantha is a splendid one to behold Calantha is a splendid one to behold Calantha is a splendid one to behold Calantha is a splendid one to behold Calantha is a splendid one to behold Calantha's Avatar
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    I'm not sure you would actually have to tell them WHAT you sell. I don't know how it would be viewed if you did. I think mostly they just need to know that you DO make money enough to support another child. Maybe you could just state your other jobs and say that you are in "web sales" on the side? You will need some proof of your income but I don't know that they would go into details as to what it is you sell. My husband is a software programmer for a bank, so we never really ran into the question, but they never asked him for details on his job either. They asked "How much do you make?" and "What is the name of your employer?"
    Good luck!
    -Brandy
    Brandy(33) DH Dan(33)
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  3. #3
    Registered User HLLB HLLB's Avatar
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    Hmmm...I would say it wouldn't matter. But, I would tell them up front (they really hate it if you lie!). I would think they would require seeing where you store your products to make sure they are not accessible to the children. I would also recommend not using a strictly Christian agency as they may not be as open minded (not saying they aren't open minded, just saying they're possibly not as much as others...).

    We have a side business and they did ask us what it was, but since we both have full time jobs as well, we won't have to submit our financials for the business (no more so than what we report to the IRS).

    Holly
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    Adoptive mom of 2 amazing kids from South Korea (Miran is expected home in April/May 2005)

  4. #4
    Mason and Laken's mommy DaynaDayne is on a distinguished road DaynaDayne's Avatar
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    Thank you both for your replies. I feel fortunate that for the business that we have we can do drop shipping therefore we are not required to have any overhead. We don't store products in our home anymore. Well I should back up a bit. We have a few (very little) products left over from when I was doing home parties. Those are stored away and only dh and I have access to them. I am planning to get rid of those very soon. This is somthing that I have been concerned about since considering adoption. Thank you again for your input. Best of luck to everyone.
    If there is anyone out there who is willing to share any of their stories about using a North Texas agency I love to hear it.
    Dayna 34, dh 36
    ds 7, dd 8/29/04, m/c 9/96
    2 dogs, 1 fish
    7 rounds of clomid with no luck
    1 IUI with clomid bfn!
    ovarian drilling 9/02
    2 more cycles with clomid bfn
    repronex 1/03 scrubbed 7 follies
    Gonal F 3/03 scrubbed 14 follies
    Gonal F 5/03 scrubbed 7 follies
    IVF cycle 9/03 failed! frozen cycle 11/03 3 embryos transfered-failed!
    12/03 Sticky blood pannel results postive
    moving on to adoption
    1/15/04 ++++pg test at dr. office surprise!!!!
    1/16/04 ob-gyn labled high risk due to blood disorder
    edd 9/16/04
    It's a girl: Laken Marie
    Lilypie Baby Days



  5. #5
    Mom to Ethan & Olivia Skywaitress94 Skywaitress94's Avatar
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    Feb 2002
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    We are doing foster/adoption. They keep encouraging us to be forthwright and to always tell them the honest truth. I have heard it hurts more to be dihonest.

    Goodluck. Oh, my dh was really unsure about it as well until he came to love my nephew who was adopted through the same program. Give him time and keep praying.

    With foster/adoption you put very little money into the actual adoption, about $200, and you recieve a subsidy of about $600 a month in my state to help with costs while they are your foster child pluc medicare and WIC.

    Lisa
    Lisa - 29; Mike - 33
    IM A NEW MOM!
    Foster Parent/Adoption for:
    DD Olivia DOB: 2/27/03 &
    DS Ethan DOB: 12/07/03

    Angelbaby Gabriel 7/23/02

    Metformin 1500mg
    Lexapro & Xanaz

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