I was five weeks pregnant after trying for a long time to get pregnant... no drugs, just good timing. I was so happy, I had everything I ever wanted for such a short time. Miscarried this weekend. I wish the bleeding would stop so I can just move on, but it's a constant reminder. This was my first pregnancy, and it was a total disaster.
How do you move forward from here?
__________________ Abby 30 Chris 33
Married 9/1/02
ttc since 12/15/02
dx PCOS - 12/23/03
Finally pregnant! EDD 1/8/08!!
I'm so sorry you have to go through this. I am sending big (((((((((((((((hugs ))))))))))))))))))) your way.
I didn't miscarry, my baby died and I had a d&c, I think they call it a missed abortion. Anyway, it has been 3 weeks, and I can't move on. I guess it depends on how well you deal with it. I am not doing so good. I hope you have an easier time letting go than I am. Of course nothing is wasy about this.
Don't feel ashamed to ask your doctor for something. I know my doctor very well, and she knows me, so I didn't have to ask. She gave me Xanex for anxiety for the first 2 weeks. Last week she took me off it and put me on Zoloft for depression and post traumatic stress disorder. She also gave me ambien to help me sleep.
We do need to grieve, but there is help out there and don't hesitate to ask for it. It does help! Also there is a great thread on the ttc board called ttc after a loss. I never wanted to be on that thread, but everyone there is so nice and understanding. Come over when you feel ready. You can vent, talk, ask advice, anything.
I am so sorry for your loss. They way I moved on after my losses was with a lot of tears, talking with my close friends and coming here. Lean on us when you need us. We are always here for you. In time, it will get better. You will never forget your little one but it will get easier. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.
((((more hugs))))
__________________
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I remember coming home from the hospital and seeing the couch in the living room...the last time i sat on it i was pregnant...but now i wasnt...its the worst feeling...and even though many thoughts run through your head and you think you;re going crazy...you have to believe you;re not alone. That nothing you did or didnt do caused this...and that when people try to comfort you and cant...thats okay. YOu need the time, as much as you need, to get better.
Your family and friends will rally around you, and i know for me i never felt as alone and isolated in my life as i did after i lost my babies...but i've found a lifetime of therapy from these women...women who've been there and struggle daily...and to move forward you have to reach out for as much support as you can.
As Clarrissa said TTC after a loss is a great thread...whether your ready or not to even think about it right away...
sending you big hugs
__________________ Kim 40 PCOS/IR/IC/PIH/PTL
DS6yrs-preemie-30w)Twins-Met,Prometrium, Puregon Injectibles DS3YRS
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TTC#4 w/Injectibles-IVF conversion/CERCLAGE/6.2mo bedrest/emerg c-sec at 38wks
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Although I have suffered a loss in the past. I am so very sorry for your loss. My advice is to stop trying to get through it and feel your feelings, be good to yourself and talk it through. Do something to "mark" this pregnancy. I am planning to plant a rose bush to dedicate to my angel. Treat yourself the way you would treat your best friend given the same news. I am sending you hugs.
__________________ Kathy
Kallan and Melissa 1997
Darby 2000
Surprise! +++hpt 9/2/04
HCG 31,166 Progesterone 13.5
Bellybean due 4/20/05
12/1/04 It's a healthy baby girl!
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M/C 4/19/2004 9w1d
angel Casey 1995
PLease remember to supplement with folic acid acid if you are ttc. It saves babies' lives!
Thank you so much everyone.... I'm just checking in to let you all know I'm doing much better... I grieved all weekend, just cried and cried, and talked to my girlfriends, and finally DH got through to me, and we talked about the future, and how this is not an ending... merely a beginning. We've decided it's time to be more agressive about TTC, because we were so happy for that one week, it's definitely what we want. I meet with a new OBGYN (the practice has a great reputation) in two weeks, and I'm starting to write down all of my questions for her.
DH had a good point for me... now we know that we can conceive, so we're closer than we've ever been!
__________________ Abby 30 Chris 33
Married 9/1/02
ttc since 12/15/02
dx PCOS - 12/23/03
Finally pregnant! EDD 1/8/08!!
Wow that is exactly what I was going to say. After the initial greving period what got me through it was the fact that after 3 years of ttc that we did. Finally I knew that it was possible and that was a miracle for us since we had a male factor too. My faith also helped me a lot. I didn't have a d&c my doctor monitored my levels and let me miscarry naturally. I ended up getting pregnant the first time we were intimate after my miscarriage. What a surprise. I now have a beautiful, energetic dd, so there is hope. I don't think you ever forget your loss though. My m/c child's dd was May 20th and event though it has been a while I still get sad on that day.
so devastated 
