Thank you all so much for your advice. I greatly appreciate it. If you care to know, I do have an update on the situation:
My bf broke up with me. He says he loves me but that he could never have a child with me seeing as how there is a chance she would have PCOS. He basically does not want to "damage his gene pool" with an imperfect gene from me. He says that a future with me does not feel right.
He also revealed to me that when his parents first met me, they had no idea that I had PCOS or that anything was "wrong" with me. But they told him after seeing me for the first time, "Are you sure you want to stay with this girl? She looks a little deformed...like there's something wrong with her."
I was so shocked to hear that. How could that possibly be? I am overweight, but that is the ONLY outward sign of my PCOS. How could they say something like that? How could they possibly know?
A little sidenote is that my now ex-boyfriend is from Germany, and I now see that he was brought up totally different from me. He and his parents truely believe that because I have PCOS, I am genetically deformed in some way. Therefore a future with him is out of the question.
I am hurt, angry, and so sad. How cruel can people be, especially one that you say you love.
I am sorry things didn't turn out better, but I really thank all of you for the good advice.
"Damage his gene pool?!" WTF!
Tell him that World War 2 is over and the concept of a "pure Aryan race" is over!!!!
I know you are hurting now, but you are SO better off without him. That is an awful and potentially dangerous mindset that he and his family have. Don't believe a word of it. You sound like a wonderful person and it is their loss to exclude you out of their lives due to their ignorance.
I am sorry for your loss but I am sure that you will find someone who will see what a beautiful person you are and that PCOS is NOT the end of the world...hundreds of cysters on this board have gotten treatments and had babies. Don't let anyone make you feel like you are "defective" or a freak. That's rubbish!
Ditto to kat. You are soo much better without him! On the flip side-- I wouldn't want someone who thinks that way to be the father of MY children!!!
__________________ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
me,age 32
dh, age 33
ds, Luke-10/30/02 (Gonal F/IUI)
Met ER 1500mg
Prenatals and extra Folic Acid
Expecting Twins To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. (Gonal F/IUI)EDD:11/11/04
Claire and Helen born October 2, 2004
Claire(5#11oz) and Helen(4#14oz)
To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
October 30, 2002 My Sweetheart!!
To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
Wow...that is almost unreal to think of such a thing happening. The subtle arrogance is astounding and I'm not even sure if it is intentinal or not. I can understand his parents having a skewed view...all parents tend to. But in that manner where they actually question whether you are deformed...it sounds like this family is stuck in that "must acheive the perfect race" line of thinking. It is best that you got out of that relationship while you could...it is much better for you self esteem wise, that's for sure. I am glad to see that you gathered up the courage to talk with him about this partially due to the posts made in this forum and we'll be pulling for you in the future. You are not deformed or damaged at all...you deserved to be loved for who you are. Don't ever forget that...
__________________ Current situation: We are now happily engaged to be married...the love we share has taken the next step.
I just wanted to say how sorry I am for how you must be feeling. It never feels good to break up with someone you care about.
I do have to agree with the others that you deserve much much better... and just never know when the "right" one will come along. Stay strong... and realize that you have plenty of support while you are dealing with such huge disappointment.
Hang in there.
Karen
Klassical Kat said it better than anything I could say. all I can think of is if you look up the word HYBRIS in the dictionary, you will see your ex-bf's name there. He can kiss my big, fat, white pale butt if he thinks PCOS women are damaged goods! What a freak-a-zoid!
You are a queen, not "damaged goods". This guy doesn't know what he is missing. dumb a*&. Sorry, I get a little MAD when I read crap like that.
Someday a REAL man will come into your life, cyster. And he will be the King to your queen.
Blessings.
__________________
To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. This is me.
Like Kat and Lindy have said, you're so much better off without this ignorant *mofo* in your life. Honestly, be glad you got out now while you can, and that you didn't end up with his sorry butt as the father of your children, him and his family would've polluted that poor kid's mind, just like they polluted his... never settle and never accept anything less than the best, which this poor sad pathetic loser obviously is not!!! You should be happy (to have dodged that bullet) and just know that YOU are too good for HIM!!!
--All I want to do is hide from the world and take a break from reality and that's just not possible because time stands still for no one and before I know it I'll be a "has-been" without ever being a 'was'--
As heartbreaking as this is for you now, I am sure you will look back upon this time and think you were lucky to get out of this relationship.
Do you really want to be with a person who can accept no blemishes on others? What would have happened if you did have kids with him and they turned out to be less than perfect? Would he have done a runner then? The answer is probably yes.
Take the time to grieve the end of a relationship, and then get back out there! You are not lacking in any way at all.
If he loved you and wanted to have a relationship with you, then it would be about you and him. Not about the outcome of the human race, and the family gene pool! WTF!
People with that mindset trouble me and it makes me sad for those who get hurt by them. For this I am sorry. But there are wonderful men out there who are very accepting and who can feel the pain this condition leaves us with at the best of times! If I had a daughter and she inherits PCOS, I will have no fear for her because I will bring her up to be a strong healthy woman who knows to power on with her life and take no excuses.
I wish for this guy a partner with a perfect body and perfect health no brains and no love for him in years to come. Maybe he won't learn his lesson, but you will move on. Take time to heal from this hurt.
thanks so much 
WTF!
Kathryn
Hybris 
