I haven't posted anything about this here because for the past five weeks it's been easier for me to pretend it didn't happen and just get on with things. Five weeks ago I had a miscarriage. It was early in the pregnancy, but I'm still hurting. Anyway I've been cramping ever since and this week the pain became more severe. After an examination on friday the bottom line is I haven't expelled everything and have to go into have a scan tomorrow and probably a d&c. Now that I've faced up to it I felt like I really wanted to tell you all.
Anyway, could do with some positive thinking for tomorrow, because I'm scared to death. Pain doesn't bother me much, but hospitals and needles and anaesthetics and just being a patient....I just hate them. I talked to a friend of mine today who is a midwife at the hospital and they said they do the D&C surgically there because they feel it's better for the patient and they always keep patients in 1 night.
I'm so sorry to hear you've gone through this loss and pain. I really will be thinking of you over the next couple of days, hoping all goes ok for you, as well as it can, you know what I mean.
Lots of love
__________________ Age: 26
DX: May 2004
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Walking & Low Carbing to 146lbs - nearly there!
July 07 : 167lbs
Sept 07: 153lbs
Nov 07: 147lbs
May 08: 144lbs
July 08: 140lbs
hey paddy, i'm so sorry, i really feel for you. i'll be thinking of you, try not to worry - i have no doubt that they'll look after you well and you'll be out in no time. you sound as though you are a very strong person and i know that u'll be fine.
lots of love and hugs
claire xxxx
__________________ Tinks "Be nice to everyone u meet, they may be fighting a battle u know nothing about."
"A smile is the prettiest thing u can wear," but " a true friend is someone who sees the pain in ur eyes while everyone else believes the smile on ur face."
"Letting go doesn't mean giving up, it means accepting some things weren't meant to be."
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Well, the scan went well and the miscarriage is actually complete. This confuses me cos the GP was sure that my uterus was enlarged and contained 'stuff', but according to the sonographer it's fine. So no d&c for me. Yay!!!
But my ovaries are in a very bad state and this is more than likely what is causing the pain. I've to go to the GP again today to get a referral to see my own gynae. We have health insurance through DH's work so I'm going to go private and hopefully I'll get seen quickly.
So I'm not really sure what to think to be honest. In a way I think an incomplete miscarriage would have been better in that it can be fixed easily, whereas the problems with the ovaries are a longer term problem. Know what I mean?
I wonder if that's related to your PCOS, Paddy? You may get some good investigations done, and maybe that's a good thing too, longterm, as at least now they're looking at you, they can fix you up so you'll be even healthier and stronger when you conceive again.
Lots of us here have had miscarriages and are here for you if you need us. It can be devastating, and sometimes you're in shock for a while, as you say, just functioning and coping with life, so it can hit you later. So be kind to yourself, Paddy, and don't worry too much! (Easier said than done, I know).
I conceived again - and carried baby to 37 weeks - within a few weeks of my last miscarriage, and the worry of the new pregnancy (I bled throughout) meant I never really properly came to terms with the last miscarriage. It's only now, 6 years on, I think about it sometimes. You get good days and bad. But I always console myself that I couldn't possibly have my lovely 5 year old son, had the other baby survived - and so some things are just meant to be, for a reason you can't always see at the time.
It's good news no D & C though and I'm sure things will normalise anyway given time, but some extra investigations might help.
Lots of love, Polly x
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Time for me to come clean... 
I'm really sorry to hear that.. 
Hope you're ok 
