I know this is weird post in this section, but I feel it is totally valid. In june we lost our daughter at 21 weeks. Initially I had premature rupture of membranes which lead to rapid dilation and premature birth. AS a result they ran a blue million test and found out I had three mutations on my thrombophillia panel. I have recently started TTC again and it is so awful and so scary. It is like you have had a taste of goodness and now it is all gone. The rigors of infertility are so daunting emotionally and finacially and as a person you are so fragile still. Yet, somehow I continue to face challenges daily and I survive. I am a RN and this Tuesday I had to go to the postpartum floor and work ( the floor where I was when I had my m/c) That was tough, but I survived. I can only hope I have the courage to continue this journey even though the odds are not in your favor!!!
My heart goes out to you. I am so sorry for your loss. Last Sept. I lost our son at 14 weeks due to placental abruption and to this day I still feel fragile and emotionally drained... I feel like the experience has tainted any future joy I might feel if I find myself pregnant again. I feel like my body failed my baby. Even though it's something I pray for daily, I am scared to death about becoming pregnant again, and I wonder if that fear is why we still haven't had any success almost a year later... I keep trying however... so at least I am heading in the right direction I guess... Good luck in your journey.
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ME 37, DH 38
TRYING SINCE 2002
CONCEIVED 1st time JUNE 2009
MISCARRIED OUR SON SEPT. 2009
CURRENTLY TAKING
METFORMIN 2000 mg
PHENTERMINE 30 mg
PRENATALS
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Wow - this is something I was just seriously thinking about. We found out I have incompetent cervix when we lost Christ at 22 weeks...
I am so ready to be pregnant again but so scared of everything that can go wrong. I feel like the innocence of being pregnant has been stolen from me. No longer is the goal to get pregnant - which was the goal for eight years. For eight years I felt that you get pregnant you bring home a happy lovely little baby. Now I know better.
I am so sorry for your loss. We are waiting for AF to show up again before we are allowed to TTC - hopefully the next few days she'll be here.
Tammy
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~Christopher Allen Doern~ Born July 4, 2009 @22 weeks to incompetent cervix.
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"The true measure of a life and love is not how long the flame burns here on Earth, it's how strong it burns in the heart. - Tammy Doern
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one day we will achieve what we want most in our lives A BABY, I know how hard it is to be hopeful but you will be pregnant again, that's what I keep telling myself. I do get emotional and think it's my fault, but we all have a dream and dreams come true if you believe enough in them. Good Luck ttc , I wish you tones of babydust
TTC after a loss 
