TTC and very emotional

Tinkiecat · 05-29-2003, 12:53 AM

I have been ttc for nearly 2 years now. I just found out last night that one of my close friends is pg after trying one time, another close friend is pg and another is talking about going for #3 and she has a 4 month old baby! I feel surrounded by this and cant bear to talk to or be around my friends because I cant handle this. I am always on the verge of tears, or bursting into them. I try to explain that these are my issues but they dont understand. idont want to lose my friends but i dont want to hear about their pregnancy all the time. I was dx with pcos in jan 2003, but I think it is just sinking in and it is making me feel so depressed. I really want to feel better but cant seem to do it. I tired of feeling like this. I am sure there are others here who feel the same way, I have no one here that understands. I would like to know how anyone who has felt this was dealt with being in those situations.
thanks!

DillyDallysMom · 05-29-2003, 08:51 AM

First of all let me say that i completely understand and your feelings are very normal. having gone thru 4yrs of infertility after suffering a miscarriage, i was devestated and emotionally a wreck! it seemed like everyone around me get pg at the drop of a dime, everytime i went out shopping i would see pg women, every commercial on tv featured a baby.......it was so depressing. i finally ended up having to go on Prozac b/c i just couldn't pull myself out of this deep seeded depression. Women that haven't gone thru it just dont understand either~i mean, you dont want to take anything away from them b/c this is a special time in their life, but it hurts you so bad when you want it so much and it just hasn't happened yet. i did well over 60 pg tests and getting neg after neg is so hard....you just have to keep moving forward, take good care of your body and keep praying. Having PCO doesn't mean that you'll never have a baby, it might just take a little longer. hang in there. talk to your friends and tell them how happy you are for them, but that with all you're going thru, its really hard on you~i'm sure they will respect you for telling them and have empathy for your situation. good luck to you

Mandi-Lou · 05-29-2003, 09:38 AM

I just wanted to say hello and have you know that you are defiantely not the only one!!! (((HUGS)))

I sank into the biggest depression when I was officially diagnosed and it has taken me a very long time to come to terms with it all. I still have days when I think that it is all a waste of time TTC as I feel like it is never going to happen, but then I get the good days when I feel positive, and whilst it might not happen right away I know deep in my heart that it will happen sooner or later.

I know it is hard, especially when your friends don't understand what PCOS is about. I have a couple of friends who will listen to me whinge about not being able to conceive, and the hell that this pcos puts me through then there are the others who couldn't give to toot's as to what is going on with my body.

That is why I am on soulcysters everyday. It is my outlet. At least I can know that I can come here and someone will know what I am going through, and if they don't then someone will always listen (read). I also come here to be able to talk to others and try to help them as well. So please don't think that you are completely alone, there is always someone online who is willing to give a shoulder to cry on or a ear to listen!!

As DillyDallysMom said, tell your friends that whilst you are happy for them, they need to know that you aren't going to be jumping for joy with them on the outside, but maybe on the inside you can be really happy for them!!!

I wish you all the luck in the world and I hope that this TTC rollercoaster is one that you get off really soon!!! And remember, anytime you need to cry, laugh, or scream, just yell!!! Someone will come to the rescue!!!

~~~~~BABYDUST~~~~~

Hugs
Mandi
xox

kcromer462 · 05-29-2003, 04:18 PM

Hugs to you my dear. I totally understand where you are coming from. It is sooo hard to hear about everyone's pregnancies and how easy it was for them to get pg, etc. I was dx with PCOS in 01-01. I went through alot of depression. Lots of ups and downs. At first I didn't tell too many people about TTC and PCOS. But then I decided it was nothing to be ashamed of. It actually helped me to start talking. It was surprising how many people had gone thru infertility and/or knew someone who had, etc. Another thing that helped me was this web site. The Trying to Conceive boards are wonderful! They are educational and supportive. I also decided to gain as much knowledge as possible about PCOS, infertility and anything associated. I decided that knowledge was power. The more you know, the more you understand about your own body, health and can be more educated and ready for strong questions/discussions with your doctors. I had problems with my friends too. They really didn't get it or want to get it. Some of them are no longer friends. Not just due to this, but partially. Try to find one or two people in your life who really care about you and who will listen and support you. For me it was my husband and one of my female cousins. I don't know if you believe in God, but prayer helped me alot too. I always tried to remember, if God puts you in it, He will see you through it. Anyway, read, read, read, talk, talk, talk. May I suggest purchasing Dr. Samuel Thatcher's book on PCOS. It is a huge reference manual. It totally explains PCOS and how it affects everything. It also discusses infertility and pregnancy. Fortunately I got pg in 01-02. I say this not to brag, but to give you hope and encouragement. I had a relatively easy pregnancy. I had a very healthy baby boy last October. I hope this helps some. Please feel free to email me directly. I will always listen. Kcromer462@cs.com