Very Sad

Hope1142005 · 10-10-2005, 01:10 AM

Please dont think im crazy if you read this. I just needed to get this off my chest.

Before I started taking diet pills I was very depressed. I felt bad all the time & hated the way I looked. I then started taking diet pills & lost nearly 50 pounds and started feeling alot better & felt better about how I looked. I had to stop taking the diet pills because I could no longer afford them & im now starting to gain the weight back. Ive gained back 10 pounds so far. And I know the rest will follow. I am already getting depressed again. My doctor has already told me that im at high risk for stroke & heart attack. Im scared that my weight problem is going to end up killing me. And the sad part is sometimes I wish it would. Ive dealt with weight problems all my life. And im tired of it. I cant make myself stop eating without the diet pills. Its like im addticted to food or something. Its an awful feeling. And if thats not bad enough ive got a big facial hair problem & im losing so much hair on my head. When I wash my hair every morning I have 2 or 3 handfuls fall out. I dont have much more to lose. Ive always had really thick hair, people have always commented on how thick my hair is. Now people are asking me why im " getting my hair thinned out so much" I have to fight back tears. I am so afraid im going to wake up bald one morning. And another thing that weighs on my mind is that my husband will be 37 in Nov. He is more than ready for a child. And I cant give him one. We have been trying since we got married in Jan of this year. I know there are alot of couples that have been trying longer than that. I just feel bad because im not normal & cant give my husband a child that he wants & deserves so badly. Every month he gets his hopes up, only to find out that im not pregnant. Well I think im done complaining for now. Im sorry for the depressing post.

Allure · 10-10-2005, 01:20 AM

Hope,

I'm sorry your going through a really hard time right now! ((HUGS)) big bear ones too! Please keep your faith and believe! I know your really worried about what's happening. Have you talked to you doctor about this recently? If not please go see him/her!! I think you need to also say how your feeling right now! Wish I was closer to you to help!! Miss you and take care! You know where to find me if you feel like talking!

Wendy M. · 10-10-2005, 01:38 AM

I know exactly how you feel, I was taking diet pills also that I got from my Dr. I was on them for a few months around 4 to 5 months and I lost 40 pounds it came off so quick and it felt great. The problem was that it never really showed me how to really eat healthy it just never made me hungry. So after I got off of them at first I was ok, then I started to eat and then it was back to my old habits and so then 5 pounds turned into 10 pounds now. I really want to start to take them again but really also thinking that it is just a quick fix to loose weight and I know that it is not showing me or helping me to stop my bad habits. So this time I think I need to make sure that I choose something that is going to help me and show me how to loose weight and keep it off. I know it feels so good to look and feel better about yourself but know that it is always about your inner buety and that is the most important part. People can loose or gain weight but they have to know they feel good on the inside before they can feel and look good on the outside. Just know that God has a plan for you and your husband and just keep your faith and pray he is there for you through all of this and he will help you out with all of it. Things will get better and your days will be brighter!!! (((HUGS)))