Who has adopted through CAS?

Sam29 · 11-03-2008, 10:09 AM

I just have some questions for anyone who has adopted through CAS:

What was the process for selection of your child?

How much say did you have in what 'type' of child you wanted?

What difficulties did you and your new child face ie. developmentally, emotionally etc?

What types of children are available?

Do you worry at all about the birth parents being in the picture now or in the future?

Any information or input, stories etc would be appreciated!

Thanks

DaisyDelite · 11-11-2008, 12:09 PM

We just adopted a 4 year old little girl through CAS, she was placed with us 3 months ago.

I'd be happy to answer your questions.

What was the process for selection of your child?

We saw her on the Adopt Ontario site, requested further information. She has special needs so we did a lot of research to ensure we were able to provide for her. My worker contacted her worker, this was just before the A.R.E (Adoption Resource Exchange) in Toronto in April. When found out that our daughter would be represented by her worker at the event and we went directly to her booth to speak to her SW. It took a few months, in July we had an interview to adopt her, a week later we were picked and she has been home with us since August 27th.

How much say did you have in what 'type' of child you wanted?
It is 100% your decision on the "type" of child you feel would fit best with your family. You will be asked to fill out a questionnaire on the type of child you would like. If you are very specific about adopting a certain type of child, it may take longer to find a child that meets your criteria.

What difficulties did you and your new child face ie. developmentally, emotionally etc?
Our daughter has Global Developmental Delays. She is 4 years old but more at a 2 year old level. We don't have a medical reason as to why she is delayed but we love her regardless. She is a beautiful child that I know will surprise a lot of people as she develops. She has made so much gains in the short 3 months since she was placed with us, it is amazing to watch her grow. We are very proud of her.

The challenges for us is going through the process of finding the support she requires, all the doctor and therapy appointments she requires but we knew this before we adopted her.

We were fortunate because our daughter is bonded with us almost immediately, we have had no issues with bonding, behavioral, sleeping, eating etc... She is a very affectionate little girl and also bonded with our whole extended family the first time she met everyone.

What types of children are available?
All children with CAS are considered Special needs. If you want to adopt a baby then it can take years because most children are over 2 years old.
Also there are a lot of sibling groups that required to be adopted together.

This is a good article from the Adopt Ontario site:

Quote:

Adopting a child with special needs, a child of a visible minority, or a sibling group can be an extremely rewarding experience.

The term "special needs" is a broad term and usually means that there are ongoing needs that will require certain parenting skills and approaches that reflect an understanding of these needs. In some cases, outside services may be needed as well.

Some people think of "special needs" as meaning that there is a physical handicap or other obvious disability. Sometimes this is the case. However, many of the children have needs that are quite invisible. In actual fact, it is widely believed that all adopted children have special needs related to the difference of being raised by a family you were not born into. Therefore, even an adopted infant will have special needs.

All adopted children especially need loving, stable and nurturing homes and committed parents. Those who adopt children with particular special needs are like any adoptive parent - they want to love and parent a child. The only difference is that they are prepared to raise a child who may have life-long emotional, social, psychological or physical needs.

The Children's Aid Societies and some private adoption professionals and agencies provide training and education that will help you understand the joys and challenges of raising these children. It is recommended that you complete an adoption preparation program before or during the homestudy. If you have a homestudy completed, you are still encouraged to participate in an education group.

You will learn that every child, and their needs and circumstances, can vary. In addition to loving your child, special strengths and attributes are needed to help a child with special needs deal with life long issues including:

* Unknown or difficult backgrounds
* Incomplete history
* Adoption as a sibling group
* Adoption as a toddler, young child or adolescent
* Mental or physical health issues
* Genetic risk factors
* Loss issues
* Racial or cultural identities different from the adoptive family

When a child is proposed for adoption and matched with prospective adoptive parents, all background information that is known and available, including medical and other details, are shared with the adopting parents.

Look at the Resources section of this website for some links to useful books and articles about adoption. You will also find lists of adoption education and support groups.

Adopting a child with Special needs has been a very fulfilling and wonderful experience for us. It was not in our original plan we we decided to adopt but I truly believe things happen for a reason.

Do you worry at all about the birth parents being in the picture now or in the future?

At the beginning this terrified me but now we welcome it. It opens a whole new world up for our daughter, she has her past, all the info she requires and one day when she is ready and old enough and wants to, she can meet her birth family.

We actually met with our daughter's birth mother. It was a very positive and amazing experience, very emotional too. It is something we can share with our daughter, to let her know that so many people cared for her. Our plan is to send pictures and updates 2 times a year. The important thing is to establish boundaries.

I hope this helps. Good luck!