Why China, etc?

Mommy_at_Heart · 05-31-2007, 06:12 AM

For those of you who consider adopting outside of America...what made you decide that? I mean, I totally understand adopting a child of your own race...a Chinese-American family adopting from China. I guess what led me to this was a comment from Angelina Jolie...who said she wanted to have a child from every country she loved. I know she didn't mean it this way, but my first thought was...like a collection.

Errr, I'm sure this is all coming out wrong. But I was just curious!

dna · 05-31-2007, 06:42 AM

Unfortunately as much good as Angelina does she also is doing a bit of harm "collecting" her children. She is fortunate enough to be able to travel to these countries and pre-select her children therefor fast track her adoptions which makes it look "easy" and that she has skipped some steps. Who knows in the end if she has or not, no idea.
Anyways...back to your post.
We adopted outside of (canada in our case) becuz there are simply too few children here to adopt and the process takes years and years. Our son was our first and we adopted within our race from Ukraine. Our daughter was adopted from China and I guess this is where your other question comes in. Why we would think to adopt outside of our race. Well to be honest we didnt really think. We have always been in love with China, her beauty and culture and we know people who have daughters adopted from China that could help and bond with our daughter to help her with issues she may have in the future. For us its a non-issue.
I guess if I had as much money as Angelina I would be going around "collecting" too. We are currently trying to figure out how to add another child to our family. Thank goodness for countries allowing "collections" these days or we would be screwed.

P.s. Your post makes you sound racist. It did come out a bit all wrong. I tried to answer your question without getting upset and I hope I did ok.

Take care !

Mommy_at_Heart · 05-31-2007, 07:14 AM

Thanks for responding! I knew it would come out wrong.

But anyway, I don't care what babies are adopted, as every one of those children need loving families. And since I'm no where near the adoption option, I don't know how I would feel if I were facing it. From where I sit now, young and just starting TTC, I can just picture having biological children and *maybe* adopting later on. But of course, only God knows if I will ever have my own. I've already lost 3. But I digress. I guess when I see my kids, I see them as looking like a nice combo of DF and I. So if I were to adopt, I'd probably naturally gravitate to a child of white descent. But who knows what child would steal my heart. Hopefully one day we can adopt a few kids (if money and room permits) and we'll have the large family I've always wanted!

Erin.Kavanaugh · 05-31-2007, 08:37 AM

my husband is first gen. american from korea so south korea seems like a good fit however i have not ruled out the foster system as i am not having children for quite some time

Tensei · 05-31-2007, 09:52 AM

I'm not an adopting mommy (yet) but I just thought I'd share about my aunt.

She simply has a heart for children in need. She adopted four beautiful children from the Philipines and at first, it was a bit different to everyone that they didn't look like us. Now, no one really notices it. We're family, and that's what counts.

I can understand how some people would rather stick with children of their own race. DH leans a bit towards that, but he's not dead-set on it.

ProudPCOMom · 06-01-2007, 06:27 PM

My husband and I are going the Foster/Adopt route. We currently have 2 beautiful Anglo children placed with us, although we are open to other races as well. It's actually kinda funny, these 2 unrelated children match our family in hair and eye color and are what I would call good 'fits'.

For us, we made a concious decision on whether to open our home to only Anglo children or welcome other races as well. It's a very personal decision that every family will discuss if/when they step onto the path toward adoption.

We are dealing with an uncertain future for our family, as we don't know if we'll get to keep these little sweeties forever - but we're certainly enjoying every minute they're here.

Calantha · 06-01-2007, 09:17 PM

We adopted our son, our first child, from Colombia. Part of that decision was simply the fact that we do speak some Spanish and that we love the Latin American culture. Guatemala had also been our our short list, but in the end, we couldn't afford it and we were led to Colombia where our son was just about to be born at that time. One of the things that made Colombia attractive to us was that we wanted a boy. In Colombia (and a lot of other countries too!) boys wait. Most people, for whatever reason, request girls. When we were researching, it frightened us to learn that the boys who don't get adopted in Colombia, will age out of the system around 13 years of age. They are put out on the streets, where they will likely either die or be recruited as "soldiers" for the drug war. I'd go back to Colombia for another boy in a heartbeat, sign me up for a "collection"!
Our daughter was adopted from China. I don't know how else to say it than we were led there by God. I know not everyone believes in God and I certainly don't want to turn this into a debate, so please just understand this is our perception of the events that took place in our lives at the time. It all started when DH suggested China because he knew some people from China at work and had heard a lot about the problem of abandoned baby girls from them. I was still unsure. The Chinese culture and language were.. and still are sadly.. very unfamiliar to me. I try, but I'll be honest, I don't understand a lot of it. What happened from there was everything from dreams, to offers of help, to a little baby smiling and waving at me in a crowded restaraunt, to finally seeing our daughter's chubby little face smiling back at us on a waiting child list. Meant to be, without a doubt.

Mommy_at_Heart · 06-02-2007, 12:36 AM

Thanks for all the input! I was truly curious. If I were to adopt from China, I know it would have to be a baby girl. They are treated so badly. But it's true. You can have one plan for your life, and God could have another. Frankly, I only want to be where He leads. Never know where that might be...! Adoption is such a wonderful thing, and I'm glad we have it as a choice to make.