I have been through so many different anti- depression meds I might have exhausted the list! Nothing seems to be working. It all started when my husband left and I STILL don't want to leave my apt. I moved close to my best friend so I could be close to someone- I have been in therapy for well over a year, I got a new job, etc. I have dated 3 men since my divorce- ALL of them broke up with ME because of my 'mood swings' and that they can't 'deal' with me. Whatever happened to love all of me or none of me?? It seems I drive men away. I fell hard for the 3rd one - we were together for 4 months- (hey- I am pushing 32 and don't have time to waste!) and one day he loves me, the next he breaks it off over the phone because of my MOOD SWINGS!! I talked to my doctor about that and she said there is only so much the meds can do. Are ALL men this shallow? Will ANYONE ever love me for me? Help me rather than push me away???? ARGH!!!!!!!! I meet these men through dating sites. I don't know any other way. I AM SICK OF BEING DEPRESSED ALL THE TIME!!!!!!!
When can I learn to be happy alone??
__________________ SCOTTISHSWEETIE
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Meds- too many meds to mention here Diagnosed with PCOS- 1998
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I'm sorry you are having a rough go. Have you tried to find a counselor, someone that can teach you how to handle your depression? I found that meds just weren't enough. I have a great counselor that taught me about vitamin and mineral supplements to help, and also how to meditate and shut off the hateful voices I would play in my head. It really changed how I treat people and how they treat me in return.
Good luck, and take care.
__________________ Lucky mommy of Quinn, 6 years.
PCOS, IBS, Clinical Depression, Lyme Disease, allergies
trying to go natural, down to 1 script, 1 OTC(love u Zyrtec!) and lots of vitamins
It seems like all of your relationships haven't made it past the early stages. If your behavior or mood swings are upsetting to the men you've dated, it's not surprising that they cut and run. I don't really think it's shallow, it's just that they don't have a lot invested in the relationship.
It's true that meds can only do so much. It sounds like it's time for some honest self-evaluation and self-improvement. Really focus on yourself and get to know and be comfortable with you.
When we're in a bad place mentally, we tend to attract the wrong sort of person. Until your improve your love for yourself, your confidence, and your self esteem, I'm not sure you'll find anybody worthy of you.
I know this even with myself, but when you are feeling insecure, down, depressed and all that-AND trying to date new people, your attitude differs. People sense the insecurity and if you think about it on those days your attitude is probably not as nice as it could be.
I have also used the datign sites. One thing to ask yourself is, do you really protray a full accurate version of yourself on there, or do you hide things, or surgarcoat them. If you do then maybe thats why they leave after awhile because they are expecting one thing and gettign soemthing completely different.
I agree with the other gal, you and only you know what you are doing. Do you find yourself with a short temper, are you a yeller, are you rude to people when you are down and expect them to tolerate it (because they should accept the good with the bad?)
Take some time for yourself and think about it......
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You might be onto something EE - You just described the kind of person I can't stand to be around. I might be doing that and not even know it- if I constantly complain about how crappy my ex was, etc- no wonder men run off... and another good point is the fact that I live up to my cheerful, happy, life-loving person for a few months and then maybe the 'real' me comes out once I am comfortable with a person; and I feel like I can maybe yell or be depressed and bring down the house- it would be no wonder they cut and run at that point.
It might be too soon to try to date right now. The separation and circumstances surrounding the divorce were extra harsh- I might not be ready to date after all. It seems like my therapist placates me on this issue, so I thought I was ready to get out there. I just don't know how to work on myself!!!!!!
I work at home, I had a falling out with my 'best friend' (she did something really awful to betray me) and I kind of have no contact with the outside world. Happy couples still make me sick when I see them. I wonder how long it is going to take???? Hmmmm....
__________________ SCOTTISHSWEETIE
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Meds- too many meds to mention here Diagnosed with PCOS- 1998
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I can completely understand what you are going through! My sons dad after ten years didnt come home for a week then tells me and my son on Christmas Eve that things arent working out and that he is moving in with someone else. The worst thing about it was the fact that he would never tell me why he left. I still feel like it was my weight gain since he never took me out.
I think also scottish that when you are bummed out(as I was too) we look at things alot differently, are a lot moodier, and tend to thinkthe world is out to get us)
It took me three years to get where I am able to date.
Its so easy to be happy and all that when you are talking to someone online. Its almost like you can pretend to be the person you want to be and what you think they might want you to be. You get happier as the emotions grow but then when it comes to meeting time they are dissapointed then so are you because then its like you think why cant I ever find someone whos going to like me for me.
It is going to take time, and it will honestly suck in the meantime. Thats just being honest. BUT as time goes on, you will realize you might like it better by yourself, youll slowly feel better about yourself(noone to answer to if you look bad for a day or are bummed) and slowly it will get better......
Thank god you didnt spend the rest of your like with someone like that, and ditto for me also
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Why do I always wind up posting on this thread? 
- You just described the kind of person I can't stand to be around. I might be doing that and not even know it- if I constantly complain about how crappy my ex was, etc- no wonder men run off... and another good point is the fact that I live up to my cheerful, happy, life-loving person for a few months and then maybe the 'real' me comes out once I am comfortable with a person; and I feel like I can maybe yell or be depressed and bring down the house- it would be no wonder they cut and run at that point. 
