I was absolutely elated when I found out I was pregnant on October 12th. I could hardly contain myself because we've never been able to get pregnant and we've been trying for years off and on. I know that the timing isn't the best to get pregnant while you're in college but I feel that too soon we lost our chance. I went in for my blood work and then got the call from not so elated nurse the next day. Please note that this wasn't my regular doctor because she was on vacation. None the less I liked the new nurse a lot! She was really nice but told me that I needed to come in that day because things were not as they would expect for someone who should be anywhere from 4 to 6 weeks along. So I went to the apt and the nurse sat in the room and talked with me for a long long time. Asking the " have you been sick or under stress a lot lately" type questions. And it dawned on me that I had been (I had h1n1 a couple weeks before this with very high fevers and such)... immediately my balloon deflated and I started to stuff it all inside. I literally thought I was going to be sick! I wanted to scream and yell at the world but couldn't because that is very improper! I still feel like screaming and yelling and I do that often around my house but it's as if I'm not accepting things.
I guess it was a good thing we didn't tell that many people...
__________________ Renee (Nay) 27 & Jeff (DH) 28
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my "kids" 1 retriever Lucky; and 1 Goldendoodle Fozzie
Dx: PCOS March 13, 2000
Other Dx: PTSD, Depression/Anxiety, Fibro, Sleep Apnea, High BP
Rx:Metformin 1500mgER, Prenatal Vits, Provera 10day
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I'm so sorry to hear that. =( Did she say the H1N1 might have affected the test results (giving a false positive) or that the sickness may have terminated the pregnancy? If it's the latter, then there is hope because you were actually pregnant!! And that's great news!
She didn't know... she said it was most likely that it was terminated after being sick like that. Thanks gals - tomorrow will be a better day - I was just over emotional this morning! lol... typical for me from time to time!
Time to rejoin my body with my weight loss journey
__________________ Renee (Nay) 27 & Jeff (DH) 28
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my "kids" 1 retriever Lucky; and 1 Goldendoodle Fozzie
Dx: PCOS March 13, 2000
Other Dx: PTSD, Depression/Anxiety, Fibro, Sleep Apnea, High BP
Rx:Metformin 1500mgER, Prenatal Vits, Provera 10day
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Renee - *hugs* I am so sorry that you've had your good news stripped away. I know that 'at least you were able to get pregnant' doesn't sound like much, and it drove me nuts after we lost our son, but it is a small comfort in itself.
Just know that things truly do happen for a reason, even if we never understand what that reason was or is. We lost our son 22 weeks through the pregnancy on July 4th - he was due november 7th. If he had lived this new baby we just found out I'm carrying wouldn't be here. The loss sucks, and after 8 years of trying with no luck it was a devastating loss - but there is always the other side of the storm you're facing. *hugs*
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~Christopher Allen Doern~ Born July 4, 2009 @22 weeks to incompetent cervix.
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"The true measure of a life and love is not how long the flame burns here on Earth, it's how strong it burns in the heart. - Tammy Doern
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Renee....do you remember me? I'm from the st. cloud area too...we used to talk in the mn cysters thread. I"m so very sorry. My thoughts are with you right now. i went through and early miscarriage in August and it is so frustrating. Seriously, I'm more settled now and know my way around and what not...if you want to meet sometime and just talk please let me know. thinking about you hUgs....
__________________ Leigh(29)DH(35) Married 12-28-07 TTC#1-June 2008 Cycle 1-Natural cycle, No O, BFN Cycle 2-Femara, trigger, O, BFN Cycle 3-Natural cycle, O, BFN Cycle 4-Natural cycle, O, BFP, didn't know/m/c 9 month break for testing, laproscopy (all normal) Cycle 5-Femara, trigger, O, BFP! 8/17 (m/c) 8/27 Cycle 6-Natural cycle, O, BFN Cycle 7-Femara, trigger, O, BFN Cycle 8-Femara, To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
Awww you ladies are all the best! Life gives someone issues and you help lift them up! Congratulations Tammy!! And yes Leigh I remember you! I was wondering what happened to you!
__________________ Renee (Nay) 27 & Jeff (DH) 28
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my "kids" 1 retriever Lucky; and 1 Goldendoodle Fozzie
Dx: PCOS March 13, 2000
Other Dx: PTSD, Depression/Anxiety, Fibro, Sleep Apnea, High BP
Rx:Metformin 1500mgER, Prenatal Vits, Provera 10day
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I just wanted to say that I am so sorry for your loss.
I understand the feeling of wanting to scream and holding it in. My first loss I kept it in until finally one day while driving home from work I just lost it. Thank goodness we were on the off ramp almost home...DH had to take over driving and just held me in the car. When we went inside we laid down on the bed and he just held me and let me cry as hard and loud as I needed to. A good friend told me to punch a pillow and then take it and hit a wall or something with it...just to get the anger and frustration and pain out. I did that and it felt so good. I did it a couple more times...and it felt good not having to keep my feelings in check. So my point of all of this is to let it out...you deserve it. Forget about how it will make others feel or how they may look at you...this is your pain and you can express it in the healthiest way you know how. I wish you peace cyster...and know that you are not alone.
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so very sorry for your loss renee, i know its hard to accept, but atleast u could get pregnant.. i know that doesnt help at all
but i just wanted to let you know that im here if u need to talk, and i know how u feel sort of, im pregnant with twins, and i found out at 31 weeks one of the twins was no longer alive, for no reason, he was always the smaller one, so they think it was the blood flow, but i dont care what it was, it still hurts. and it hurts knowing he is still inside my belly with the kicking twin!
it hurts, my GOD it hurts bad, but i know in time to come it will get easier to deal with as ill have a son (hopefully if everything goes ok..) to look after and keep me busy.
just wanted to say, its ok to be mad, hurt, its ok to cry... just dont hold it in, its all just apart of grieving.
xoxox
__________________ ashie XoXo
Me 24 To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. Rob 31
ttc since feb 2005 metformin 2000mg march 30th 09 IUI ~ 3 good follies! BFP!!!!
its twin boys! one twin lost at 32 weeks To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. other still fighting on...
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Take your time and grieve however you want. I just delivered my son 2 weeks ago. I only made it to 17 weeks through the pregnancy which seems like forever when you want a baby so bad. I cried and I cried but my boyfriend was by my side the entire time. He just held me and let me cry. It helped because he never told me it would be okay. He just said let it all out and don't hold it in. That's what I did. It has only been 2 weeks, now all I can think about is getting pregnant again.
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Me (27) BF (37)
DX w/PCOS+IR 3/08
TTC #1 since 2/08
Surprise BFP July 4th
Beta #2 July 14, 7055
3rd u/s Aug. 4th, HB 175bpm
Stick Baby...Pleasseee!!!
Miscarried at 17 weeks
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Why right now? 
hUgs....
