So, we have now been told that we can't apply because we haven't been married long enough. They don't count the fact that we've been a couple since 1999... Why?! I don't get it. We know each other in and out. I have wanted a child since I was 14... and my desire only gets stronger. I've had to stop talking to people in my family that are pregnant because I cry when I look at them.
One day... right?!
Thanks all for listening!!
__________________ Renee (Nay) 27 & Jeff (DH) 28
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I think they just want to make sure that you are in a stable marriage before putting a child in the mix. There's not really proof that your were a 'couple' for that many years, but marriage is proof that you have been together since that day.
I can understand to a point. They want to try to put these children in the best home they can find.
I personally think everyone should have to go through what us adoptive parents have to do to have a child.
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Son (2 1/2 year)
I completely understand why. It's a lot of stress on a marriage to add a baby/child. They want to make sure the baby/child is in a stable home. They go by marriage time b/c it's a legal time you've been together.
That being said, I think it's a little silly b/c there are single ppl that can adopt & be in/out of relationships all the time!
Good Luck!
Traci
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I think they just want to make sure that you are in a stable marriage before putting a child in the mix. There's not really proof that your were a 'couple' for that many years, but marriage is proof that you have been together since that day.
I can understand to a point. They want to try to put these children in the best home they can find.
I personally think everyone should have to go through what us adoptive parents have to do to have a child.
I thinkn that everyone should have to have an interview before they have kids...some of the questions that dh and I have to answer is so personal...I don't want to even go through an agency b/c of the just the amt. of more questions that we have to go through...
I thinkn that everyone should have to have an interview before they have kids...some of the questions that dh and I have to answer is so personal...I don't want to even go through an agency b/c of the just the amt. of more questions that we have to go through...
You still have personal questions if you don't use an agency, because you still have to have a homestudy.
__________________ Amy (33) SAHM & To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. Join for free...only 2 more days!
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Meme...i know...we have done the homestudy but with all of the Texas agency that we looked at AFTER we got the h/s done...we still had to do all their questions...and have interviews with them...with an alternative way...they just get your h/s and profile and talk to you....no lenghty 50 page thing to fill out...
Hello, as a single person whom just completed an adoption. I would just like to add (not start a debate here) that there are many restrictions on your dating life while you are going through this process. All past relationships are scrutinized heavily.
Also if I had started dating anyone, I would have had to go back to the start of some of my paperwork and had him (the boyfriend) have a full background check and other forms completed; (which could have delayed the process). Basically treating him as a parent figure already. How would you do that to someone that you just started dating? Personally I found it easier to not date, to avoid that dilemma.
To add to this, each country and adoption agency has their own rules and ideas about what is acceptable as far as your dating life is concerned. I just wanted to add this, from someone who has gone through this process.
Naymarie- I am sorry that you have to wait a while longer. Think of it as time to put more money aside and to take that vacation (just the two of you). Once you start the process and after you bring your child home, everything changes. The changes are wonderful though and worth the pain the process may cause to get to the end. Good Luck, when you get the green light to go ahead!
I know what you mean...this is SO not fair...we have the same problem...we actually tried to adopt before getting married and now we have to wait since we are married...it's stupid! If they accept same sex couples and look at how long they are together, they should do the same with straight couples. I understand your frustration!
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I hope you dont mind me joining you ladies! I have been thinking about adopting a child as well as one day TTC. I have always wanted to help at least one child and make a difference in there life giving them a family. Best of wishes to everyone
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Me (Kate) 31 DH (Chris) 37
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AF arrived 08/25/2009 YAY !!! To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
Well we've looked into other agencies and it seems to only be our local ones that require the 3 year commitment first. We are going to an informational meeting down in the cities next week they are going to talk about the legal stuff the first night and then about the other general stuff at the next class in April. I'm excited yet a bit nurvous. We have also been talking about adopting from Russia or the Ukraine... we have someone in our family that speaks Russian so I wouldn't have an issue with the launguage barrier at least!
__________________ Renee (Nay) 27 & Jeff (DH) 28
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my "kids" 1 retriever Lucky; and 1 Goldendoodle Fozzie
Dx: PCOS March 13, 2000
Other Dx: PTSD, Depression/Anxiety, Fibro, Sleep Apnea, High BP
Rx:Metformin 1500mgER, Prenatal Vits, Provera 10day
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Why so long before we apply? 
