Why so much Money???

One tattered Angel · 02-20-2008, 11:45 PM

I have found a few adoption agencies and facilitarors I like but when we get down to numbers I about have a heart attack. Maybe I am looking into the wrong places. I was thinking an adoption around about $20,000.oo would be good for us but is there such a place?Everone is telling me around $26,000.oo and above. Yickes!!! I just thought when they were talking $25,000.oo to $40,000.oo were for all international not domestic adoptions. Am I that wrong? UUUghhhh. Love-Lesia

calches · 02-21-2008, 12:49 AM

Oh sweetie! I am right there with you! It amazes me! The amt. of money that some ppl think that adoption should be. I think that when it gets to that point that you are literally buying a baby. There is no good reason why anyone should pay that amt. of money for a baby. Even if they are a CC baby that is just absurd.

I have basically ruled out all agencies b/c I just don't get a good vibe from them and then they are on a sliding scale. Which for most of them starts out at $20K. My husband and I are comfy with our money but seriously there is no way without saving for a few years that we would be able to afford what some are wanting for babies. We are having to pull from dh's 401K to afford it and then another small loan. We seriously think that we are going to be able to do it for $20K....there are ways you just have to find them.

I can send you some of them that I have found...actually I have only found one that is a referral service that does not have any application fees and no up front fees....you pay when you have a match...if the match falls through then it rolls over...this is Adoption Advertising...I haven't heard anything bad about them and I called some of their ref. tonight and did hear some horror stories but all in all they all recommend them and they would use them again. Tomorrow I am calling the rest of the references....I am getting excited about this one...

Anyhow sorry to be so long winded...hope it helps...

Miss-Meme · 02-21-2008, 10:31 AM

Yes there are some on sliding scales. Those would be the ones that you want to look at if money is an issue.

~Traci~ · 02-21-2008, 12:49 PM

I think it also depends on your state's laws. Some states require you to pay all the BM's dr appts & some other expenses. You should start asking for a breakdown of fees to see exactly where the $ they're requiring is going.

We adopted internationally & our adoption cost under $30K including travel in country for 2 weeks (3 adults & new baby). The great thing about international adoption (not sure if this is the case for domestic adoption) is that you don't need that amt up front. The big bulk of it was travel (our costs would have been less but we traveled during peak season & some costs were extras that we decided to splurge on) & we didn't need that until a little over 2 years after we started the process (more time to save that $!). Some countries are getting longer & more expensive (as well as different requirements) so you just have to look around.

Good Luck!
Traci

Miss-Meme · 02-21-2008, 01:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ~Traci~

I think it also depends on your state's laws. Some states require you to pay all the BM's dr appts & some other expenses. You should start asking for a breakdown of fees to see exactly where the $ they're requiring is going.

I know in a lot of states if the BM is on Medicade or what ever it is called, that her doctor app. and hospital stay and the birth are covered. I'd say the baby's also if she isn't able to sign right away. Once the baby is in your care it's covered by your insurance.

I don't think I've ever heard that you are REQUIRED to pay living/other expenses. I'd think that if you were not opened to paying that you would then be matched with another bm.

Normally the cost that you are quoted is just what you will pay the agency. The other expenses are not added into that normally.

finn · 02-21-2008, 06:25 PM

wow I cant believe the cost of adoption over there, we paid $3500 total for Isaac's adoption and that was for bm's legal fees and our legal fees. There are no agencies over here it is all government run, it is illegal for us to give any money to Isaac's bm. International costs alot more but most of that is travel.

anang · 02-22-2008, 12:43 AM

Our adoption of our three boys from foster care cost us nothing, and we medical until they are 18. The were not newborns but 6 years, 2 years and 8 months old is not old either. Plus we still get the 11,000+ tax credit for each of the boys. They are doing great, and we are happy. I know it is not for everyone but, worth a thought.

check out nwae.org for examples of the "Hard to place"

Lots of kids need homes and if money is in your way with private or international .......

One tattered Angel · 02-22-2008, 05:49 AM

Thanks to all that responded. I guess I was just so surprised. I guess I deffinently need to look up more info about state to state laws ect. When we adopted our son thru Fostercare it was so much more diffrent than what I have read. We paid total $750.oo but was reinbursed so it cost us nothing in the end.We just are tired of fostercare and ready to be out of the system.

Thank again ladies. You all are great. Love-Lesia

~Traci~ · 02-22-2008, 02:31 PM

There's also the tax credit to remember. You have to come up w/ the $ on the front end but it's nice to get it w/ your refund! And yes, foster care or foster-to-adopt is a great option for some but for me, I don't feel comfortable doing foster care b/c I would want to keep every baby/child that came in to our home...it would be way too hard for me!

alexander4372 · 02-22-2008, 11:14 PM

I'm wondering the same question myself. I adopted my first when she was 16 months old and it was private and not through an agency and all we had to pay for was a legal fees and a home study. it all cost about 5000.00 total. I have been looking at both international and domestic and wow it is expensive. I just sent in an application at lifetime they charge 12,500.00 and then I was told I still have to pay for legal fees and home study. So now I have to get a break down of where the money goes. It is a non profit orginization. i know they spend a lot on advertisment for birthmoms. I just don't know which way to turn I can't afford it and I hate to go in debt but I want a baby so bad.

One tattered Angel · 02-23-2008, 03:56 AM

Quote:

I just sent in an application at lifetime they charge 12,500.00 and then I was told I still have to pay for legal fees and home study. So now I have to get a break down of where the money goes. It is a non profit orginization. i know they spend a lot on advertisment for birthmoms. I just don't know which way to turn I can't afford it and I hate to go in debt but I want a baby so bad.

__________________

Yes this is where we are at. I talked with Lifetime and was told they are full for right now not taking in anyone else.
I talked with Adoption Network and they are up to about 33,000.oo. Ouch!!!
Alexander....
By the way. I see you are from Utah. What part? The reason I ask is my mom was born and raised there and has many brothers and sisters still living there. She is from Santaquin (SP). I went to college in Salt Lake.

Talk with you later. Lesia

alexander4372 · 02-23-2008, 01:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by One tattered Angel

__________________

Yes this is where we are at. I talked with Lifetime and was told they are full for right now not taking in anyone else.
I talked with Adoption Network and they are up to about 33,000.oo. Ouch!!!
Alexander....
By the way. I see you are from Utah. What part? The reason I ask is my mom was born and raised there and has many brothers and sisters still living there. She is from Santaquin (SP). I went to college in Salt Lake.

Talk with you later. Lesia

I'm from St. George Utah

With lifetime did you send in your application and a picture of your family? Gosh if they are full i wish they would have said that before I filled out my application. I am also looking into A Act of Love they sent me some info they are a little more expensive but seem really good too. This adoption thing is tuff. I can't believe its 33,000 at Adoption Network that is crazy.